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I'm falling for my boss, but I don't want to!! Any suggestions on how to get over him?

Tagged as: Age differences, Big Questions, Forbidden love, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (13 September 2008) 2 Answers - (Newest, 13 September 2008)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

i've been working with my manager for 18 months now...and i've just realised i've fallen for him.

At first i didn't like him he was blunt and ill tempered with me, but as time went on we started talking more and i relaised he has an amazing personality.

He's funny, kind and can be caring. i didn't notice my feelings for him until last month and i had - lets just say - a very graphic dream about him, lol, when i woke up i thought 'where the hell did that come from?' i guess i must have put my feelings to the back of my mind.

since then i think about him all the time and even go as far as to purposely swap shifts so i can see him more, hes nothing stunning, but not ugly either so its not just his looks.

However i know the feelings are in no way reciprocated and hes is 13 years older than me with a wife and two kids and i would never make a move on him (i'm no home wrecker). i just want to know how i make things easier on myself (because knowing nothing can or will happen is starting to hurt) and i'm open to suggestions on how to move on.

Thankyou

View related questions: move on, my boss

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A female reader, burr United States +, writes (13 September 2008):

honestly sweetie,

I highly advise you not to get involved with people you work with. I was just recently involved with a supervisor from another dept and he just used me as a booty call. He know with his girlfriend who just up and decided to move down here to louisiana to be with him because he doesn't like long distance relatinships. Yeah that will work ,but please do yourself a favor and not get involved. Unless he really would like to pursue something with you as a friend first than don't get involved because you'll be the only one hurting

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A male reader, saltwater United Kingdom +, writes (13 September 2008):

saltwater agony auntHi there

Well I think most people have worked with someone who they have had an attraction to -- good to hear that you will never make a move on him -- that helps us provide you with better advice.

Don't worry about graphic dreams; I've had some graphic dreams about some people, some dreams better than others...

You can start by swapping shifts back so you see him less!

I'm assuming you're single here, if you are then you need to go out there and meet people who are your age! There are plenty of caring, funny and decent men your age who are single and who are waiting for a girl like you to turn up. Join clubs or evening classes that interest you if you're looking to meet a man who shares the same interests as you..

The sooner you meet someone who feels the same about you as you do about them is the moment you will forget all about this man.

Take care.

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