A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I was dating a guy who I fell head over heels with for 3 months. Things were really awesome in the beginning and then they started to fall apart because I kept pressuring him to put a title on the relarionship. Long story short we broke up a little over a month ago and it wasn't pretty. We still stay in contact a bit due to some buisness circumstances but any time our relationship is brought up ultimately we wind up fighting. Well I've met another man who I've been spending a lot of time with. Hes so sweet and caring. He goes out of his way to do little things to surprise me, he's very respectful, and is always treating me as a woman should be treated. Which truth be told my ex very rarely did. My problem is as much as I like this new guy and am happy when I'm with him, I just can't seem to let my ex go. I miss him so much. Even though he has made it clear that he does not want to be with me in that sense. And I know our relationship would be unhealthy if we did get back together. What is my problem? This new guy is everything I've wanted and deserve. We click on a level my ex and I never did. Why do I feel this way?
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2013): You have to let maturity and experience kick in; and allow yourself to move on and find a little happiness.You shouldn't form a new committed relationship just yet. You are still in your stages of detachment and getting over your ex. However; that doesn't mean you shouldn't enjoy the companionship and affection the new guy can offer. If you'd just give that wonderful guy a chance, he will help you to recover quicker. He's just what you need.You don't bounce from one relationship into another. You date and allow yourself to ease your way out of the past. It takes time. Most people make the mistake of starting a new relationship. That's when you're likely to rebound.TAKE YOUR TIME! GET TO KNOW HIM! REPROGRAM YOUR BRAIN! You need to be available. Let the guy in and allow him to show you what you're missing. Break your chains and be free. That nice guy is going to tire of the nonsense. I wouldn't blame him.Your ex isn't wasting his time and feelings on you.It's only a matter of time, before that the nice guy will start feeling the same.
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