A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:im 15 turning 16 and i really want to have sex. i really dont know what to do. i am very nervous. i think im ready for sex but i dont know how to do it. i dont really do anything physical with my boyfriend except make out with him. Im so confused. Can you help me with this? I need to know that i have to do. thanks alot!
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female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (6 May 2009):
 There is no rules or advice on "how to have sex" - it is something that comes naturally because it feels "right". If you and your boyfriend have not started doing anything physical together except kissing then it sounds like niether of you are ready to have sex.
I suggest that you just wait a while until you feel completely at ease with the idea of having sex. If you want to take things further then you should take things slowly and start "fooling around" with each other, getting to know each others bodies better before you jump straight into sex. Doing all the usual stuff like kissing each other's necks etc - find out what turns him on most and he should find out what turns you on the most. I guess hand-jobs and him touching you down there are the most typical next step - but again this should only happen when you are ready. There are no rules for foreplay either - it should just come naturally. Your boyfriend will masturbate so he will be able to guide you with what he likes, and you can guide your boyfriend when he is touching you.
It is all about trial and error, and learning about each other and what you both like. Once you have started getting a little more physical together then sex will follow on naturally. But make sure you are protected at all times - Condoms and some form of birth control. You dont want your first time to be ruined by a pregnancy or STI scare! If you are seriously thinking about sex then go to your doctors to talk about birth control and they will be able to give you free condoms too.
I hope this helps and good luck!
A
female
reader, evelast653 +, writes (6 May 2009):
 If there's any lesson people can teach anyone about sex it's that they wish they had waited. Today in gym class I sat through a few conversations between three girls who had all had all decided to have sex this school year. The last girl, a short blonde, whimpered and whined about how after having sex with her boyfriend several weeks ago, he had dumped her, then cheated on her.
I'm not writing this to make anyone feel convicted about what they've done, that's not my job. I'm just saying that many girl your age, younger, and older, have handled sex like it's just another event like going to the movies. They don't see how in the long run having sex effects you emotionally and physically. Before you sign off on the contract take time to consider whether you can handle the payments, insurance/protection, there's no warranty on this experience. Once you drive off the lot you can bring it back. And really in the long run, not everybody like a used vehicle.
Sorry if the analogy is corny, just thought it was something to consider.
Hope this helps:]
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A
male
reader, andrew loves hali +, writes (6 May 2009):
 I'm 15 and guna be turning 16 too and I'm no where near ready. i wanna wait till Ive found the one i wanna be with for the rest of my life :) and if you ready go ahead but use a condom and in my opinion i think you should wait but its your life so do whatever. but use protection.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 May 2009): i started having sex at 15, i had a baby at 16, i should have waited.
if you feel you are ready for sex the best thing to do is make sure you are prepared,take precautions and do it with someone you love.
none of us know what we are doing the frst time but you will learn, its all part of a process.
dont have sex because you think you should, make sure you really are ready, you only get that first time once.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 May 2009): When I was 17 I thought I was ready. I really wasn't. I backed out of it.
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