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I'm 14, and I think I'm rubbish in bed

Tagged as: Sex, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (4 February 2010) 10 Answers - (Newest, 6 February 2010)
A female United Kingdom age 26-29, anonymous writes:

OK well I have a great fantastic boyfriend but I don't feel like I really show my love for him and that he doesn't get what he really wants from me and that im rubbish in bed.

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A female reader, Miamine United Kingdom +, writes (6 February 2010):

Miamine agony auntmmmm... I asked you some questions.. you didn't answer any of them. And if the sex is so wonderful, and the guy is so wonderful, why are you worried and asking us for help?

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A female reader, Carrot2000 United States +, writes (5 February 2010):

Carrot2000 agony auntMiamine, you are telling the cold, hard truth! I'm well over the ago of 14 and your words struck a chord with me. I can only hope they do the same for our the young lady who posted this message.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2010):

OK well none of you clearly understand what i mean and i think your all out of order tbh!!

if it said what i wrote then you would see that i dont think im rubbish in bed i was just wondering if there was more i could give im!!

i have amazing sex and i don't think im to young it feels right and we have been with each other for almost a year now so as far as im conserd all of you can [rude comment removed by moderator] it was a big mistake posting my question on here and i regrete that now and i will never regret my boyfriend because i LOVE him and he LOVES me!!

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A female reader, Miamine United Kingdom +, writes (5 February 2010):

Miamine agony auntI'm gonna make a whole pile of assumptions, please write back and tell me if your wrong.

First, I think your boyfriend is older than you, and I think he's had sex before. I also think that this is the first guy you've ever slept with. Why do I assume this, because only a child like you would assume that she's to blame if sex is bad. Grown women know what books to read, and who to talk to, if they are having bad sex. Grown women also know that sometimes men are bad in bed and never blame themselves. You are assume that you are doing something wrong, but I bet the guy doesn't care enough to make sure you are enjoying himself. He doesn't need to, he can use your body, say a couple of "lurvve" words, and if your not enjoying yourself, then he'll say young and your rubbish in bed. Guys can do this with children who want to pretend they are grown up, they can't do this with adult women who know how the world works.

You care about loosing him, your worried he's only going out with you because of the sex. Of course he is, your giving him sex and then putting up with insults. Grown women don't have sex to keep a man, they have sex because they enjoy it. You are not enjoying yourself, but you keep having sex. Why do you do that? Grown women have sex with men because it feels good.

At the moment, you are being very silly. You are risking so much in your future. Your not fully grown yet, you still have a lot to learn. Sex at a young age makes you more vulnerable to a lot of things. I bet you don't even have a regular cervical smear exam, so your probably at risk from developing cancer.....

Sigh.. your a young women who wants to grow up, and you think that sex makes you a woman. It doesn't, a guy having sex with you at this age is a guy who is abusing you. Your a silly young girl who is trading her youth and her childhood to pretend that she's a woman. You'll regret everything your doing in the future, and you'll probably have emotional difficulties in the future with men. You haven't learnt that men who love you, just love you. No, you believe that the only worth you have is through your beauty and some sexual tricks.

We can't help you. Your looking at the problem all wrong. You are still a child. Instead of asking why are you rubbish in bed, you should be asking why doesn't the guy care enough about you to make it sex feel good.

Sorry, but there's a reason why children should not have sex so young, or with older people. You think that you know everything and we adults just say stuff. You'll understand what we mean soon enough. In a couple of years you will be grown up and this guy will be a bad memory that you'll regret all your life.

PS: Men don't care about women who are bad in bed too much, they just like sex, and always have an orgasm, no matter what you do. You need to start worrying about yourself rather than him. I believe he thinks your a fool.

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A female reader, junebug81409 United States +, writes (5 February 2010):

Honey! I wish i could tell you this and that about being to young but i was your age.but plz just be careful.i had a miscarriage at the age of fifteen.what kind of life is that?not right.i was a baby myself!sorry i just want you to understand i wish i didnt have sex at a young age but ur question........yea your not gonna be good in bed ur so young and if ur bf is pushing you to "show" him how much u love him than thats not right. U dont need to have sex to show someone u really like them ok?good luck

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A female reader, mystiquek United States + , writes (5 February 2010):

mystiquek agony auntAt 14, I would imagine almost anyone would be "rubbish" in bed. The scary thing is, WHY are you having sex at 14? Sweetie..you're way too young, and all kinds of problems can come out of this. If you don't know what you are doing, then maybe you shouldn't be doing it in the first place. I seriously doubt if you are going to get any advice from the aunts, because at your age, you really shouldn't even be having sex. Your body isn't fully developed..you aren't matured enough either emotionally or physically to handle sex. That's not a lecture, its just cold hard facts.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (4 February 2010):

your 14 and having sex? thats against the law! you can get in alot of trouble and so can your bf. i suggest to not to those kind of things due to the fact that your still too young and should save it for when you find the right man.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (4 February 2010):

why are you sleeping together anyway? you're breaking the law and could get your man into trouble...

Save the sex till you're older...

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (4 February 2010):

Don't worry, no one in their teens is any good in bed. You are all too nervous and twitchy to tell your partner what feels good and what dirty things you want done to you and vice versa.

With that said.. you are too damn young to be having sex.

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A female reader, xxxsabsxxx United Kingdom +, writes (4 February 2010):

you are 14? you should be rubbish in bed. you two should not be in bed. please, you really need to grow up. if you are writing this, it means you are not ready to have sex. you are too young. if you think you are ready, then you shouldnt be posting this. im not having a o, just giving advice. you really must be too young to be having sex if you post things like this xx

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