A
female
age
30-35,
*ailAway
writes:This is a question especially for people who like answering questions here. About their relationship on screen between the people they try to help and the people who get answers.The people who answer here have so many things they know and sometimes I have read their Column's sometimes about things tht sometimes they says things about then and why they know things. I have really liked so many of the answers here and I think the people who answer here are amazing. I have asked a question and I was very impressed with the answer thank you. I dont think I feel I can answer questions yet because the answers on here are so good and people think of things I would never think of. But I have a question of the people who answer the questions because it has made me wonder about the feelings of the people who answer the questions.Firstly I dont understand how some people get rated so high and some so low because I often life answers and I give them a rating but when I look at the ones who get high ratings and some who get lower ratings it does not make sense to me. How many people have to rate you to get just one point up or down? And I see some answerers who are rated high one day and then go down down down a few days later. That does not make sense. Are there other things you have to do and forget to do that makes Andrew rate you down? like if you make spelling mistakes or something?And it seems that some of the people who answer must put in hours and hours and do really special replies, much longer than any I have received. But that does not matter to me as all the answers I have receive have been so good and helped me so muchBut do people who answer questions get sad when they drop down and down in their ratings?And how do they fix it? Does Andrew come and say to them stop doing that, you are not helping yourself?Or do other people who answer help each other and say, answer like this and you will improve?Or do some people just get all their relatives to rate them high so that it will look like they give better answers than they do?And do some people who answer just get so sad at being rated poorly, even if they answer really well and just give up? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, svf +, writes (26 May 2011):
 What a Gem of a question - and one that I have wondered about also!I know that personally, sometimes I can't help but want to answer the questions, as I really find some of the questions really move me into answering. When I have the time to log on, I sometimes will put a lot of words into an answer, maybe sometimes too long, but at other times my input is pretty short.In regards to ratings, I do know that I went down heaps due to an addition to a previous question that I answered recently - except that the original reply I typed didn't get posted until 10 hours AFTER the additional add on I made, so reading the 2nd post first may have come across as insensitive to the OP.I guess if it comes down to 3 strikes and you're gone then maybe I'm not much longer for this site!I'm not sure of how answers are rated - but I do know I've got one of the highest really 'poor' score ratings going, so maybe it wouldn't be such a bad thing! I have since tried to be more tactful when I think I hurt someones feelings before and have felt awful that upon reading my reply that it came across as a bit harsh, so I have tried to tone my replies down somewhat - and don't log in very often as a result. Or it could be that my advice sucks - or someone out there hates me!Anyway, why don't you try answering some questions to? I know I really appreciated the advice I was given when I first asked for advice and ever since then, I guess I just want to help people as much as they helped me.Hope you're well? Sammy x
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2011): I constantly see wonderful answers from all the people who give good advice in DC. Sometimes one can see 100 outstanding answers in a row, and there is not one that could ever be rated as poor.And it is clear over and over again that the collective wisdom of the Aunts and Uncles is huge, and their kindness and empathy is there for all to see. The person who asked the question is the best one to assess if the advice was helpful or not. And those who do rate the answer to their question are very fair and generous indeed. The ones who are disappointing are those who did not ask the question, but decide the advice is poor, and yet are not willing to advise the Aunt/Uncle why the advice was alleged to be 'poor'.I think that proves that DearCupid only allows very good and excellent standard answers through. If people think the advice is consistently poor then perhaps the Aunt or Uncle might really like to know why? Anonymously pressing the poor rating over and over again must be a very lame boring activity?.
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A
female
reader, Dear Mandy  +, writes (14 May 2011):
 Hi
Firstly I would like to say, what an interesting question to have asked :) In regards to peoples ratings on us, If they are negative it is probally due to the fact the person has not liked the reply because it maybe to close to the truth for their liking, and some people just can not handle the truth, Also some responses maybe so far from the orginal question they asked in the first place, that this did not help them. In regards to ratings going up and then down, its because every day there are new questions to answer, and some people offer better advice than others, so naturally their ratings will be good one day, and not so good another. Everyone I feel is good at giving advice, its weather you can take advice. To have that feeling of knowing you have helped someone weather young or old, straight or gay, black or white , is an accomplishment. If I can help just one person feel better about themself and their life, then I know its worth my time being on here. So in return will make me feel good too.
I hope this has helped
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A
male
reader, Welsh Uncle Dave +, writes (14 May 2011):
I give my opinion, it's up to those if they want to listen.
I've found over time that often people around me or on here may not like what I say but six months later they turn around and say I was right or that they should've listened.
It's probably due to my bluntness. I say what I think and they may not want to hear it at the time. It doesn't bother me if they don't listen - I've done my bit.
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