A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Should I tell my boyfriend I am falling in love with him? We have been together for only a few months but it hit me recently that I am in love with him. Or should I wait for him to say it first? I don't wana put pressure on him to say it if he doesn't love me back. But I can't hold it in much longer I don't think.His actions say we are both on the same wavelength, he texts and rings me all the time, every single day, throughout the day, he sees me nearly every day, and in bed its just incredible, really slow and sensual, lots of kissing, before, during, after, and then we just stare into each others eyes, smiling, kissing, admiring and always hugging and cuddling in. I know it all sounds soppy, but I haven't had this feeling for years, I forgot what it was like, and I'm just so happy I want him to know I love him. I text him soppy stuff and he always says he misses me, and can't wait to see me, he says he likes me lots and lots, but never used the word love. It would be nice to know the feeling is mutual, or I don't know if he is trying to figure out for himself, I dont know. He tells me he has been cheated on in the past, and I should tell him if ever things weren't right with us, I don't know if he is worried to fully let go.I just don't know :s
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female
reader, YouWish  +, writes (26 July 2014):
 A few months is WAY TOO SOON. You could scare him off, AND you should wait for him to say it first. For a girl, saying "I love you" or "I'm falling in love with you" is an expression of emotion. For a guy, it signals a commitment that brings on a whole new level of expectations. That isn't until later in a relationship, as a few months is when many people are deciding that they're going to call each other girlfriend and boyfriend.
There is no rush! If you want to express emotions to him, tell him you're "crazy" for him or that he makes you so happy when you're with him. This will reassure him. One thing to understand - him being cheated on in the past is his baggage. He shouldn't react differently to you because of the actions of another woman, otherwise he isn't yet over her.
Go slow, let HIM bring up the L word, and it's too early anyways a few months in. Love should be SEVERAL months in with time and trust, which you don't have the time in yet.
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (26 July 2014):
 If you are sure he is on the same wavelength, meaning you both talked about long term and there is nothing stopping him from being ready for it, then say it. He will be overjoyed. It will mean a lot because he knows that most women wait for the men to say it.
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A
female
reader, -BMBTL- +, writes (26 July 2014):
 Firstly, I am happy for you, it sounds perfect what you have! :)
I dont think that would be putting pressure on him at all, as your description sounds like he is very much feeling the same way, yet may feel scared of the feeling of being loved.
If he has been hurt/cheated on in the past he will probably still hold back in certain ways, but you sound lovely, and so does he, so what you waiting for! :)
Genuinely tell him and I am sure that will bring you even closer together!
Good luck!
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