A
female
age
41-50,
*pple2
writes:Help!I have been seeing my boyfriend for about four and a half months before we met he spent a lot of time traveling around the world he keeps saying that in a couple of years he may go off for good as he does not want to settle down in England but then says that at the moment he is happy with me but seems to emphasize all the time that this could go wrong he told me that if we are happy and we have enough money i could go with him but it feels like he is just saying this to keep me at bay, i worry that i am just something to do while he saves up the money to emigrate.I am finding it dificult as he is probably the best bloke i have ever had a relationship with he is kind and caring and we get along well, i have tried to talk to him about it but he told me it is very unatractive to be asking for this kind of commitment so early on and that nothing in life is certain. i have a 1 year old daughter to a different man i am so worried she will get attached and think that all men leave.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (18 July 2008):
 Your concerns do seem to have foundation. He may be sweet and nice, but he's saying something like "I'm happy now, but, if that were my wish later, I would just walk away. And you've been warned that I don't want to stay in England, so please don't ever complain".
You need certainty and he isn't giving you that. And, yes, your little daughter could get attached and feel sad if he leaves.
I agree with the Sister, and I quote her: "I think this is a waste of time for you if what you want is something permanent."
If you leave this guy, make it your thing not to repeat this mistake.
Wish you and your daughter the best.
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