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I want to watch my wife have sex with another guy. How do I explain this to her?

Tagged as: Sex, Three is a crowd<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (14 June 2008) 7 Answers - (Newest, 10 September 2009)
A male United Kingdom age 36-40, anonymous writes:

hi,my wife and i married for last 02 years,our sex life is really booring and i want to spice it up by dirty talk...but there is no response from her,she's very prety and sexy and she loves to wear like whore very micro skirt and low cut tops as she feel sexy when the people look at her,

lately i am watching swinging web site and vedio and foud out watching my wife having sex with other guy turn me on,so i tried to open discution about it but i scare if she refuse and will loose her so i tried to speak about her relation with friend and co worker and i told her that turn me on when i see someone eyes on her,

so the probleme how to speak about to watch her having sex with other guy,the way to don't hurt her.

i've got friend (not my best friend) i just met him he's 24years old is very good for that role but what's the best way to start it or better to leave it.

and i'am thinking about soft swing with this friend!!!!

really don't know help please

View related questions: best friend, co-worker, sex life, sex with another, swinging

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A male reader, Baja United States +, writes (10 September 2009):

I've been there. The way I got my wife interested was when we had sex I would talk about her and another man. I've always known she was interested in other women so I used that. I found her a girlfriend that was married. I knew in time it would work around to him watching them having sex. From there it would lead to him joining. It did and it broke the ice. After the first time it got easier each time.

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A male reader, Doctormn Australia +, writes (14 August 2009):

Be prepaired to wait the right time will eventually come. My wife is very prim and proper and no one would suspect that she would do anything improper, however I realised one day that she was becoming sexually attracted to a guy she works with. I started questioning her casually and gradually she began admitting that she thought that this guy would be good in bed and after many more admissions she admitted that she would like to have sex with him but as she was married she wouldn't do it. I took advantage of this and indicated to her that I wouldn't really mind if she had sex with him,she was stunned but when I told her that I was expecting it to happen sometime,and that I would like to watch her enjoying another guy she agreed

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A male reader, Red Green 0289 United States +, writes (20 July 2009):

Good luck - odds are really good that unless she comes up with the idea "on her own" you're not going to talk her into it. Try introducing her to erotica that has some group sex similar to what you want. Read the stories in bed together and talk about them.

Once (NOT BEFORE!) she is into the idea, consider a vacation to a lifestyle freindly resort (Mexico, Jamacia) where nuidty is allowed, and sex after dark tolerated.

Do NOT try to trick her to go to one of these resorts... everytime I've been there is an ANGERY woman who's there with her husband who "surprised" her... stupid and awckward for all of us...

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A reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2009):

Hi, i also had this fantasy. I felt the same what ur feeling in the beginning. One day we were really drunk, and while having sex, i brought up this topic. I talked to her about the young couple next door, and asked her would they be having sex the same way, and how it would. I told her about my girl friend before marriage and how we had sex. I asked her about her first boy friend and how he did her. I told her that i want to watch her have sex with some handsome friend of yours. Wait for her reaction, if she agrees then it is ok, my wife was hesitnent initially. But later on she agreed to my fantasy. It she goes mad the next morning, u might say that you were really drunk and could not remember a thing. GO ON HAVE FUN.

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A male reader, MrTom United Kingdom +, writes (3 April 2009):

MrTom agony auntThe wife an I talked about it for years, but as a fantasy only. But at a christmas party at our home as we saw the last friend out.

They kissed under the mistletoe full on the lips, an the kiss lasted a long time, she had her hands ariund his neck an his were on her back.

So for a joke I opened tHe could onlhe back of her skirt but she just pushed my hands away an carried on kissing.

His hands moved down her back an went inside her skirt I saw her body stiffen, it was then she realalised her skirt was open, but she did not stop him.

I could see his hands move all over her bum an I was really enjoying watching them.

Soon her skirt fell to the ground an he pushed her nickers down, her body was still stiff but she was still kissing him an had her fingers in his hair an held him tight, he could only get her nickers down a little so I pulled them all the way down an her put his fingers in side her.

I could see her move up an down enjoying this very much, next he undid his zip an belt an got his manhood out an he parted her legs an as he enter her she gave a moan.

They were at at for a long time he felt her breasts throu her mohair cardigan an blouse but did not get them out.

Much later when he left the wife would not let me near her an even cryed, an said that if i loved her I would not have let it happen.

Even when I reassured her that I realy loved her at watching her with a another man made me want he more.

But is was a two weeks before we had sex.

the wife did enjoy the sex with the man even cuming many times in differnt positions, but still felt terrible after.

Mr Tom

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A reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2008):

Well i really liked ur question coz i also had same thing in my mind. The only difference is my wife havent slept with any other guy till now. She is beautiful and very sexy, but very homely, innocent girl. I am not able to convince her to sleep with other guy in front of me. I tell her every time while having sex to sleep with my friend or any guy she likes, but she always laugh and ignore it. She replies me straight No. But i really want to see her with 1 or 2 more guys. I want to see how can she handle 2-3 guys at a time. Once she says yes, then i have to search any guy who can keep secret and have sex with my wife. I really wish all this happen soon.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (14 June 2008):

You need to really think very hard about this. Not only may she refuse, and get very upset about it, but also it could go another way, which can become the problem all too often with this sort of situation: What if she enjoys it more than you, and decides to carry on sleeping with other men?

Also, is English your first language?

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