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male
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anonymous
writes: Hello everyone,My girlfriend of four months has recently gone travelling. This was a trip she had planned before we met, so it's not something we could do together.I know she has had many more sexual partners than me, and she openly tells me that she was very promiscuous, right up until the moment we met.That didn't bother me when we were together, but now that she's away it really plays on my mind. She's travelling alone and a lot of the people she meets are lone male travellers. She does tell me about them, but also tells me that I'm the only one for her and she would never do anything to jeopardise our relationship. However, I still feel worry? anger? resentment? jealousy?I don't really know which emotion I'm feeling, maybe a combination of them all, but it's certainly not pleasant.If anyone has any comments on my situation, or any suggestions on how to deal with these emotions, I would be very grateful.Thank you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you both for your wise words.I have shared my fears with my girlfriend and we have managed to beat that little green-eyed monster back into his box.Let's hope he stays there for good this time! x
A
female
reader, Juliette  +, writes (6 August 2006):
 First of all, you are right to be concerned as it is a normal reaction but a negative one. She is being honest with you and you have to respect her for that, she is also telling you who she has met and she doesn't have to do that. It is very likely that she has realised she has greater respect for you than her previous partners and that you are the one worth keeping so try not to let her down by your automatic negtive thoughts. Alongside her telling you that you are the one for her and that she does not want to jeopordise your relationship means she is possibly testing her own resistance and needs your support to do this. It may help if you get a notebook and use it as a thought diary and everytime to get into negative thinking, start to think of positive possibilities that are just as rational and write two down for every negative one. The other thing is, is to realise that there is nothing you can do but to trust her. What have you got to lose?
You will definately lose more if you let these unwelcome thoughts overwhelm you when they are probably not even true ... as she has now met you and wants to change, and with your support she may well do that. XX
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A
female
reader, cupid helper +, writes (6 August 2006):
i no what your going throw because i have been throw it myself and its not nice i no.but you not trusting her must hurt her. let her no how you feel and sit down and chat about it.im sure you can sort it out.if you both love each other and want to be with eachother then you can work it out.yes she did it once but do you no why she did it.there are questions unanswerd you should get them answerd. share feelings and it will make you relationship
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