A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello,I told my best guy friend of 6 years that I liked him. He is shy as am I so I told him by txt. His reply was 'really? how long have you felt this way?' I told him about a year and now it has been nearly 3 weeks and he has not called,fb or txt me. I knew it was a big risk, but i could not keep it in anymore. He was leaving to go study and I did not want to risk him finding someone before i could tell him. So now he wont talk to me, and I dont know what hes thinking. theres no point in calling him, I know my friend in these situations, he will make me wait months until he thinks it has blown over so we can go back to normal. But I feel like i deserve to know, even if he does not like me like that so we can move on. I dont know why he's keeping me in this tourture. I really did think he liked me back, i guess that's why it makes me sad, but i am even sadder that he can't talk to me. I dont know if I should just walk away from us, i dont know how we can move on if he does not want to talk to me or be with me? ahhhhhthanks for your time sorry to go on:)
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best friend, move on, shy Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Jmtmj  +, writes (28 February 2012):
 I'd take his silence as your answer as to how he feels.
Yeah you can contact him if you like, but sometimes things are best left unexplained when it comes to recovering a friendship from this type of situation.
A
male
reader, Myau +, writes (28 February 2012):
 He most likely doesn't feel the same.You know whats he's like afterall, so Id just let it go.Are you ok with "just friends" though?
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A
male
reader, landomando  +, writes (28 February 2012):
I think he is in shock and you shouldn't abandon your friendship!!!!! You need to talk it over and see why hes acting like that... But he may actually like you and who knows he may be mad that you have liked him for such a long time and hadnt said anything.. and the only reason you told him is because he is leaving. So you basically just kept it a secret for a long time. and the minute he is about to leave you told him.... I would be sad. Just give him some time. If you guys have been friends for that long you will definitely talk again.
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A
male
reader, 666gayemoboy +, writes (28 February 2012):
i think it was smart to tell him because now you wont look back on it later and regret not saying anything and since he is your best friend even if he doesnt like you in that way he will probally still wanna be friends with you but who knows he might surprise you and tell you he likes you too
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 February 2012): Well, you took a huge risk by telling him how you feel. You should have expected this outcome. It can only go two ways. Then again, maybe not. Just give him his space. I know three weeks is a lot but maybe another week wouldn't be so bad.
Tell him how hard it was holding it in all this time. Most guys know what that's like. If he doesn't like you and just wants to be friends, you have to ask yourself if you're okay with that. Really, it's better to have him in your life than not at all. He's your best friend for a reason.
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A
female
reader, Deagan +, writes (28 February 2012):
 Well if you want my opinion, it sounds like you deserve an answer and he owes you one. You poured out your feelings to him and you told him how you feel. And then he ignores you. You're absolutely right, you deserve an answer to move on and that's what you need to tell him.You need to contact him and discuss with him that it hurt you that he all of a sudden stopped talking to you after you shared your feelings to him. You need to explain to him that you deserve an answer as to how he feels about you, and why he stopped talking to you. Why did he ask "how long have you felt this way?" and not respond back after you answered? That isn't fair to you. He was your friend of 6 years, he really does owe you an explanation as to why he started to ignore you. ---What's worst, staying friends while secretly liking him and never doing anything about it? Or at least doing something about it and taking that chance even if it changes the friendship? I think you were brave to share your feelings to him, even though he didn't seem to reciprocate the same. I hope you feel better that at least you gave it a shot and told him. I'd be pretty miserable being in a situation where I liked a guy but never did anything about it- it would be hard just being friends with him and seeing him date other girls. But make sure you get your closure! Best of luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 February 2012): I think he likes you but perhaps not you level and/or expectation. And thats okay.
Also, perhaps he is one of those deep thinkers that needs to ponder on it, chew it like bubble gum til the flavour goes and then he will be comfortable on a reaction.
Its no pressure. Just be happy and unburdened that you got it out - put it into the universe.
Just remain a friend.
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