A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:She says she's sexually intimidated by me, yet she's had quite a few sexual partners she's had 6 before me, she's in her mid 20's and has had some pretty wild sex from what she's told me, so how can she be intimidated by me, when we've been going at it for a year now? Ladies please help, I don't understand her, I think she just likes to perhaps make me feel good.. Your thoughts? Because I DON'T understand why she says that, I TRULY don't believe her Reply to this Question
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (3 January 2011):
 Yours is a strange comment, I don't quite get it. If she says she feels intimidated by you to make you feel good.... I wonder what she would say if she wanted to make you feel bad ! IMO, "you are intimidating me " is far from a compliment. Particularly in the bedroom.
I guess the safer option is to take her at face value and assume she is tryng to tell you that something is not working as well as it could if only...
Of course now you have to find out the if only. Be patient, not confrontational, reassure her that she is more than good enough for you ( in case she has confidence issues ) and that you are happy with your sex life, you only want it to be great for her too.
Ask her to explain what feels intimidating to her. Sheer
physical size ? Are you being very assertive, "in charge " in bed, maybe she feels she can't take the lead ? Have you got much more sexual experience than her, have you done - or she thinks- you have done wild stuff that you don't do with her ? Have you got a higher sex drive than hers and need sex for longer or more often ?
It can be a number of things, and the best way to know is to ask her. In a non-intimidating way :)
A
male
reader, Nithyanala  +, writes (3 January 2011):
 In what sense does she mean 'intimidated'? It's a word that could mean many things, so I don't think it's possible to give a fair answer based on this.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2011): Maybe you're too rough with her in bed or she really wants to be dominated by you. Maybe she's making excuses to not have sex with you. Who knows. Whatever it is, you won't know until you ask her directly. Just tell her this comment of hers has completely confused you and you would like for her to elaborate.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThat can be true, because she's always asking "was that good?" Or "did I do a good job, did u like it?" Very insecure I think, which sucks, because it makes me feel bad, and makes me not wanna have sex with her, I feel like I'm taking advantage of her.. And to the Big Monster there, at 6'4" 240, I'm not big at all, I'm 6'0" 195 you're a damn WRESTLER!! Lol
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2011): Mmmm intimidated?... well are you physically big? I mean Im 6 4 240... and some women dont approach me at all and tell me so cause theyre like "You prob toss women like ragdolls in the bedroom" which isnt true. Size and physique can be intimidating... however if its your sexual experience she's referring to, chances are I think she might be thinking she isnt good enough in the bedroom for you. Talk to her man. I have a sense she's insecure about something. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, pancakes rule  +, writes (3 January 2011):
 How did she feel about her past partners? It could be the difference of casual dating vs loving relationship. It is odd that she would say that though, unless you're incredibly good and she doesn't feel like she's as good as you would like her to be.
Ask her what it is that makes her intimidated. If it is just to make you feel good, then tell her that it isn't what you want to hear.
Good Luck
xx
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