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male
,
anonymous
writes: Dear Cupid,Hi, I'm a 22yr old male, and I'm a metrosexual,always well groomed, well dressed, look after myself, work hard, and am capable of many things.I'm also secretly struggling with my sexuality, and I'm trying to hide it, but I really am not into women, I'm trying to hide it, but sometimes feel that it shows that I am gay, and at other time i know that I hide it so well that I almost convince myself.My family got together recently for a weekend, and I felt like the odd one out, meaning that I didn't enjoy the converstaions, and discussions, my family don't socialize, and I'm the opposite, I want to go out, meet people... it has made me depressed.I'll make an examlpe, my family want the "county cabin" little socializing lifestyle. and I want more the "city exciting life".I feel as though I have outgrown them, is that normal? I feel bad, but seriously sad that what I want and what they want are completely different, and they're forcing it on me and restricting me from what i want to do by only mentioning the bad side.What should I do, I chat with them, and their response is painful, and makes me feel guilty for wanting more out of life, am I wrong? What should I do? Is it normal to out grow your family, I love them and always will, they're my family, but I can't see myself doing what they want me to do, as it will leave me miserable!any good advice. ps, my sister has left home as she is studying in another town, so I'm the only child now.
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female
reader, bridget +, writes (14 March 2006):
 Hey there,
Its only natural to feel like you have moved on a bit from your family..
Although we all love our families dearly, we will always be there for them and we cant always be with them, your sister has proven this by moving away to study and tryimg to make something of herself and good on her..
As for yourself, You need some guidance to deal with your sexuality and pointed in the right direction to help you with your choices, but this task has been sent to you to prove your inner strength and make your own decision..
You shouldnt feel guilty at all for wanting a more outgoing lifestyle it is only natural and if you have some kind of plan you want to follow then Go For It!!
As for trying to convince yourself you are straight then you really shouldnt do that, It will only add to your pain as you are forcing yourslef to be someone you are not..
Try to sit with your parents and explain that you want to do something for yourself and you want to follow in your sisters steps to make something of yourself, It will let them see that you are willing to do something with your life and that, to any parent, will let them see that you have matured into a mature young man..
As for your sexuality please dont hide it, I know you feel you have no choice but you do really, You are an individual and you are entitled to have rights and choices, so be open about your sexuality, I have seen first hand what hiding this can do for your self cinfidence and it is not alot..
If you would like to discuss anything else or if you have problems with anything you are very welcome to email me in a personal basis and I will be more than happy to help you..
My email is [email address blocked], and dont worry I will not think any less of you if you tell me anything..
Good Luck
Jacqueline
A
female
reader, smeedle  +, writes (14 March 2006):
 Cut the apron strings and move out, you are 22 and life is all out there for you.
You will find more out about your sexuality when you move away from the family, you need to meet loads of people and have some fun, you need to find out who you are and you will not be able to do this at home.
You could get a job in a city, you could go to university or college, you could look into working abroad.
As you seem to be a fun people person why not be a holiday rep for one of the 18-30`s holiday firms, you are young and the world is your oyster.
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