A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:im still very good friends with my ex boyf and was at his house the other day just hanging out. i went on his computer and discovered a love poem hed written about me (yea it was definitely about me there was no mistaking that cuz of certain things in it) very recently written. it was beautiful and showed some very deep feelings he still has for me. he writes poetry when hes depressed. the thing is i still love him too very much but when we broke up i met another guy and started seeing him. i cant break my boyfriends heart and i dont want to leave him because i love him very much. but i have never gotten over my ex. now i know for definite my ex still loves me very much too its made it harder to deal with. i cant bear the pain of loving the 2 of them. any advice? im desperate.
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male
reader, Karlos Omnis  +, writes (14 August 2007):
 Unless you have the intention of getting back with your ex, then keep these feelings to yourself.
I myself a while back was left for an ex... and it didn't work out between them.
Then after that she obviously regretted it and wanted to return, but no-one in their right mind would welcome the possibility of such an occurence happening again.
Personally I would stick with your current boyfriend, you and your ex split for a reason, and a leopard doesn't change its spots so to speak, that reason will still be there, and the odds say it won't work.
If you do decide to get with your ex anyway, don't expect your current boyfriend to remain friends with you, and you'll probably shake his trust for any of his future relationships.
A
male
reader, Zim +, writes (14 August 2007):
 Hmm, I guess I can answer this from the point of view of the ex as I am in a slightly similar situation. One thing I can read from your question is that apart from the now apparent fact that he still loves you, he is prepared to keep it quiet so that you and your current boyfriend can do well. He doesn't want to actively interfere, most probably because he doesn't want to ruin any possible connection with you.Why did you break up with him? Was there a particular reason? If there was, would this still be an issue if you two got back together?However, the crux of the problem lies in the fact that you have a boyfriend at the moment. To leave him for your ex would be unfair on him and would damage any friendship with him afterwards. Your ex probably hasn't said anything to you about his feelings because he doesn't want to jeopardise your relationship with your boyfriend. He quite obviously cares for you and wants the best for you.If you never got over your ex, why did you go out with this new guy? Doesn't he have something that makes you think "wow, I really like him" and so on and so forth? I can't tell you what to do unfortunately as it's not my place, nor do I have the wisdom to make such a judgement. If you could answer the questions above, then i'll gladly help you out more if I can.ZIM
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