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I really don't want to be a lesbian!

Tagged as: Dating, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (16 December 2006) 12 Answers - (Newest, 27 May 2008)
A female age 18-21, anonymous writes:

im nearly 18 and im so confused about my sexuality! im defo straight cause i loveee boyss! but lately i hav been having feelings for girls in the same way! :| i think i fancy girls too! i really dont want to be a lesbian! but i cant help my feelings can i!! am i turning gay or do people somtimes just "look around at whats on offer"

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2008):

I am 15 years of age. I only have sexual feelings tors other females. To tell you the truth i have been like this for as long as i can think back. I go to church and i don't want to be like this because i love god far to much.

My therapist thinks that it's because of my mom's past. I can agree to that only i rather not.

I came out to my mother and my whole family is ok with it. Well almost every one. I'm still having a hard time with it. i don't like it one bit.

I even pray for god to take my gay away. Only it helps non what so ever. God help me.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2008):

I have the ultimate answer to all of your questions.

Read about:

Romantic Friendship

Anatomy Of A Girl Crush

The Psychology With Which Women Regard Other Women

Boston marriage

Friendship Commitment Ceremony

Email me at [email address blocked]. I'm an expert in these areas. And I have a whole blog about it. Yes, I once thought I was a lesbian, but that was because I thought there wasn't any other "choices".

I thought "gay" "straight" and in "between" was all there is. Apparently, I was wrong....

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 January 2008):

First things first don't be so scared!! your worried about what other people will think if you were to discover you were a lesbian, but your attraction to boys rules that out. Don't be so hasty to judge yourself. It must be extremely difficult to go through what you are goingthrough but you must understand to give it time, things will pan out. i know this because i was a normal 11 year old when i first found my attraction for women, but i always had boyfriends, lost my virginity to a man and have been with more since then. untill i turned 18, i decided to be true to myself. i went on holiday to wales and decided to just find some space in the middle of nowhere and think about me and my life and where i am going. i could not be happier in my relationship now than ever. just try and find yourself, be true and have trust in your heart!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (3 December 2007):

I know how you feel to be honest I rather die than become a lesbian but lately I had feelings to but it makes me sick to think that the best thing to do is to avoid the things that turn you on.

I might sound like a nutter but its the truth i know how it can torment you.

Run away from thoe feelings and when no ones around scream as had as you can to let your emotions out trust me it works!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2007):

I am 25 now and have delt with the same issue my ENTIRE life. Growing up a Christian has confused me so much even to this day. Do I accept me for me and risk the consequences of my faith? OR be who everone else says I should be according to my religion? I have accepted me for me but what consequence will I face on a spiritual sense when this world and my life has ended? I think you should accept you for you b/c nothing in life should be so hard. We are suppose to enjoy life. Don't fight what is in you if it causing you heart-ache....

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 February 2007):

Hunny, Iv been going through the same lately. So your not alone! I know I want a man sexually and want a relationship with bloke. Dont get bogged down with worry like me! I dont even understand lesbian rlationships! We can all tell if other girls are attractive. Chill out and the right bloke for you will come along

xxx

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A female reader, vina_101 United Kingdom +, writes (19 December 2006):

vina_101 agony auntYeah you're probbaly just looking at what's on offer. It's probably just a phase. This is quite normal for some people so no need to worry.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (19 December 2006):

It's perfectly natural to be curious at the age that you are, I know I was. Later I discovered that there are no boundaries for feelings. No matter someone's sex, age, colour, or religion, if you like someone you like them for who they are, not what they are.

Sure, you can keep preferences about your ideal partner, but keep an open mind and you never know what you might find

Be happy x

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2006):

Alot of people go through mixed stages and fancy both sexes, so i wouldnt worry if i were you. If it carries on for years you could be bi, it doesnt mean that you are a lesbian.

Just keep calm and im sure it will all work out

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A female reader, scared16 +, writes (17 December 2006):

scared16 agony aunti have a boyfriend i hav bin wiv 4 10 months n i love boys but occasionally i hav feelings for girls. it doesn mean ur a lesbian. ir doesn necessarrily mean u r gay u jus get a thrill thinkin about bin wiv a girl. i dont want 2 go with a girl but i get turned on thinkin about it. does tha help? x x x

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2006):

Don't act on those feelings and focus your attention on guys and don't let anyone tell "How do you know if your don't try?" That is the classic trap a gay or lesbian person will use on you to get you to "open up" to further their own agenda.

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A male reader, martini Canada +, writes (17 December 2006):

martini agony auntYou're not turning gay. You are born a certain way. You are most likely bisexual. Plus it's possible you're going through an experimental phase. I know that you're probably afraid of how others see you, if your friends/family will accept you, or maybe you're religious... But, as humans we have all the bads and goods of emotions and pleasure, either they be naughty or nice. Seriously, do not suppress your desires at all. If need be, move to a place where homosexuality/bisexuality is more accepted. If I was bisexual/homosexual, there are some places I wouldn't want to be at.

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