A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I let myself become victimized by a "player" at work. Recently I brought things to conclusion by chasing him everyday to back him off once and for all. My strategy worked, but at the risk of causing me feel like a fool. Now I have to go back to work and recapture my dignity. I realize, of course, to avoid and ignore him as much as possible. How will I be perceived at work by everyone? This guy used me to make his girlfriend jealous.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2008): ....very interesting! What if he wasn't a player - just a decent attractive guy doing his best not to fall for an attractive woman at work over 4 years. Imagine if she 'started' pursuing him because she actually fancied him. Imagine that he then asked her out via e-mail only to be rejected (her worrying about the paper trail which could allude to the early signs of infidelity?). If you check the link below this sounds similar but not identical to your situation. I was the guy who was rejected and am keeping a low profile in case she has a change of heart. Plenty of work to be doing in the meantime! And yes - I think about her all the time 'cos she's really lovely (and so am I!).
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/we-are-both-in-committed-relationships-but-for.html
A
male
reader, ChiRaven +, writes (28 July 2008):
 Best guess is that opinions will vary. Some people will undoubtedly feel sorry for you because you were victimized by this jerk. Others will think that you were asking for it by not being careful enough before you jumped in with a guy who had that kind of a reputation. Still others will be completely oblivious and really won't care one way or another.
I suspect that category #3 will be the majority. There's an old saying that we wouldn't worry so much about what people thought about us if we knew how seldom they actually DO think about us.
Just get on with your life and take the lessons you learned from this experience to heart.
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