A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ahh! Ive got myself into a right daft pickle. I know im fully to blame but i dont know what to do! I split up with my ex, my first true love, of 2 years, about 8/9 months back now. Ill admit it broke me, but i thought i was over him! I got close to a couple of guys soon after who i became intimate with. Nothing serious. Over the past few months ive had dates with a few guys. One, lets call him s.. Whi i meet and have sex with on a regular basis. One, lets call him d, who i go out with quite alot, cinema, meals, go to his or whatever.. Do stuff with but we havent had sex, one, lets call him a. Who i had a fling with, but again, nothing serious although we also sleep together quite abit, and one lets call c.. Who is very nice but hes more into me than i am him. Everytime i see him he makes moves, i dont reject them but then regret it after. Theres a couple of other guys im speaking to but nothing much. I know i dont have a future with any of these guys, but i know they all like me, ive been asked out by them all but didnt know what i wanted! Ive thought none stop about this for two days. I turned my phone off and havent been on my laptop, ive stayed in and tried to figure out what to do! But i cant. Do i be honest and risk hurting them all? Do i lie? Do i just stop speaking to them? I dont want to be with anyone, i wanted a bit if fun while i was single but ive realised its gone too far! I just want to be on my own! I was offered a job about 60 miles away! Was thinking if taking it just for a fresh start far away! Im in a real muddle! Ive not had a decent nights sleeep in ages! I know im the only one who can fix this mess, but please.. I need some advice! I hope i dont sound like a bitch! :(
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2011): My ex and I dated for about 3 years and we broke up almost 1 year ago, I have seen other guys as well and some of the one I talk to I just want to be friends but they always want more. I dont really want any of them though honestly i just compare them to my ex and none of them are him so i become annoyed by their constant asking. If you move are you sure your not just gonna fall into the same situation with all new people? You probably should start telling some of them that your not interested because its not fair for them to be waiting and hoping while in reality they never had a chance. You can start fresh anywhere it just has to be your decision that way you will go through with it. Hope this helped.
A
male
reader, Welsh Uncle Dave +, writes (4 January 2011):
I don't think you're in too much of a muddle. You know you don't want to be with any of these blokes and I think you should just be honest with them and say so.
As for the job, it may do you good to start afresh somewhere else, but make sure you're doing it for the right reasons - because you want to start afresh, you want a new life and not just because you're trying to escape your problems. Running away solves nothing.
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