A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I broke up with her 2 weeks ago when she broke a major condition of our relationship. I was so angry with her blatantly ruining our love that I kicked her out of the house and immaturely called her hurtful names. We had 1 major issue before and I kicked her out because of it 3 months ago but she came back to me cause she missed and loved me.I really want her back in the worst way but I'm afraid she's gone 4 good. I asked to see and talk to her but she said I had the chance to talk but called her names instead and that she couldn't handle seeing me anyways. She replied to my Happy New Year message by saying that she loved me and wished we spent New Years's together and the only other text I got was 5 days ago to let me know her daughter was sick.I haven't heard from her since and miss her like crazy.I know she loves me but I'm afraid she's moving on.
View related questions:
broke up, immature, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (5 January 2012):
 So, you kick her out twice, and verbally abused her. I don't even want to know what names you called her, but I do know that any guy who unleashed like that on me and called me hurtful names wouldn't have gotten a second chance.
You think you can treat someone this way and then want to crawl back? An abusive breakup is like scrambling an egg. And you can't unscramble an egg.
A
male
reader, CyrusM  +, writes (5 January 2012):
There is not enough information here and the information that exists is one sided. There is always 2 sides to a story. I can only guess that your major condition was to have an exculsive relationship and that is the condition she broke, just a guess!
Questions:
1- What kind of love would break a major condition of a relationship?
2- What do the words "out" & "back" refere to in:
I kicked her "out" 3 months ago but she came "back" to me ...? Do they refer to location more than relationship?
3- What kind of love would kick the loved one out?
4- What if she really doesn't love you but she needs you financially?
5- What if you really don't love her but need her sexually?
6- Do you have temper and anger problems?
7- Does she have Financial needs or does she need attention from other men?
8- Would you have her back if she contiuously breaks your major condition of the relationship?
9- Why do you think she is right for you and you are right for her?
10- Have you specified in writing all the atrributes that your partner should have and have you compared it with her writing?
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 January 2012): "We had 1 major issue before" Have OP, have. That issue hasn't gone away if this is what has happened.
Read back over your question OP, do you see anything at all practical in it? Do you see anything about that "issue" or any kind of solutions? No because all you have is emotion and emotion isn't going to cut it. You talk about missing her, loving her and all that kind of stuff but you don't give any reason or practical implications of this, that sounds to me like you really just don't have anything but anger and emotions for this girl. All you talk about is wanting her and stuff but for what? What good, practical reason have you to think that you even should have her back, you have too many issues here and they lead you to go nuts on her. There's nothing there that sounds good to me, nothing.
You've broken up, not only that but you abused her, you just don't work and all the love in world can't make up for a relationship that doesn't work on a practical level because you simply just don't get on.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 January 2012): http://www.dearcupid.org/question/heartbroken-and-lost.htmlI'm going to suggest that maybe you work on yourself in the meantime as she is, well, kicked out and trying to sort out her feelings about it all.Yes she may love you but doesn't mean she sees you as a good man she can love and trust as your actions alone say otherwise.So, how about you get yourself to some anger management courses.Get some individual counselling.When you are healing and making healthy changes for a happier self; you can be a healtier, happier BF to some fortunate woman.It would be a great Happy New Years gift to yourself to do some self improvement. Then you don't have to feel so helpless and heartbroken as you will be busy being proactive.;)
...............................
A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (5 January 2012):
 Of course she's moving on, you kicked her out, twice now. I don't know what she did that merited kicking out, but either you need to stick to your guns and break up with someone, or not. You can't break up with people as punishment or sooner or later they won't come back. You should never ever break up with someone in the heat of the moment, you should always wait a few days til you can think about it calmly. A break up isn't a way to tell someone you're mad/upset.
...............................
|
