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I keep having this dream about her! How do I stop the dreams? And do they mean I'm a lesbian?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Gay relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (13 September 2008) 3 Answers - (Newest, 16 September 2008)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I am still unable to get over my high school crush, and I am now entering my second year of college.

When I was in high school there was this girl who seemed to be flirting with me non-stop. However, as a female myself, I was never sure if she was just being extra friendly (in the way that many teenage girls are with other girls their age) or is simply bisexual like myself, and simply had not gone public with it (she doesnt know that i am, although i think she may have guessed it too). While I suspected the latter, her sexuality is really of no consequence, since our chances of a successful relationship are near zero for a combination of reasons, including our distance away during the school year (she goes to an out of state college) and the fact that she is already in a relationship.

In high school I was absolutely infatuated with her. I might have even loved her. Although, again for many reasons said nothing! And now, two years later, despite hardly ever seeing her, having a boyfriend myself, and a list of logical reasons why we cant be together, I still can't get over her! What is the reason? Although I never consciously think of her during the day, I ALWAYS dream about her.

At least once a week for the past two years I have a dream that she is hitting on me (flirting, trying to kiss me, etc), and that I reject her. having this dream forces me to think about her as soon as wake up.

I think the only way I can be over her is if i get rid of this dream. But how?

maybe i have this dream because i have not come out yet. or maybe if i tell her how i feel, they will go away. maybe another reason. I do not know.

maybe there is another way to get over her? since the two conclusions i came up with terrify me, i will give any other guess consideration.

Please help, it is affecting my relationship with my current boyfriend.

View related questions: crush, flirt, lesbian

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A female reader, Cyg79 United States +, writes (16 September 2008):

Cyg79 agony auntI think you might be reading to much into this. You dream about her because she is on your mind or something in your day connects you to that time. Whatever the reason you did reject her in the dream. To me this would indicate you don't want her hitting on you. One of my High School crushes pop's into my dreams every now and then, but that does not mean I still have a crush on them. Rather it just a fantasy my mind reverts too when it has no other material.

Don't worry about it to much, just focuses on what you have going for you in your life right now. Best of luck to you.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 September 2008):

I used to have dreams about a girl. The only way to get rid of them is to get these impulses out of your system. Look her up, go on a date, and have a fling with her. In the morning you'll have a much better idea of what you want out of your relationships.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

lol. the title the site came up with is wrong. I identify as bisexual. I have for years.

I just want to get rid of the dreams.

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