A
female
age
30-35,
*ubblesparx
writes:Alright, I have a serious problem. Well, it's very serious to me - I'm sixteen and I'm kind of into a younger guy. He's fourteen and seems to think that after I hold his hand I want to kiss him. That's not the case at all, and I don't want to seem rude, but I can't just tell him I have trust issues (which is a lot more like a deathly-serious-phobia-of-trust). I like him a lot. I don't think we should be anything more than friends, though, until his maturity is level with mine. I don't want to have my first kiss stolen by some little prick, either. I've heard a lot of things about him (like he's a 'player' or that he only wants sex...or that he only 'dates' older ladies), which cause me to want to hold back from telling him how much I like him. I don't think he's mature enough to handle what I have to say. I'm afraid to trust anyone, but since he's younger it's untelling what he would say to his 'buddies' if I agreed to kiss him. He tends to put on a good-guy front, but I've seen his pissed off side and it's scary. He's pretty tall as well. He's about 6'1, or something like that. He's nice to me, but I'd hate to make him angry. He has a bi-polar disorder to be frank. Or just a really bad temper, perhaps. I'm looking for a lot more than he's capable of. Besides, I need someone older.So, my delemma is this: I need to let him know that we should remain friends. I also have feelings for him - and he's too young to even consider those feelings (I'm talking serious loving - maybe I'm too young, but I need someone who can see me equally and not someone who will hurt me). Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, fullvee +, writes (4 January 2010):
You are two years apart. Boy in genera mature later than girls. Its not the age, its the gender. This boy is not right for you and you know it. End it with a DTR (Define The Relationship) meeting with him. Be clear, be firm, and get it over with. Do it away from his friends to avoid embarassment, but not totally alone either, in case he is violent type. Do it like at the mall in the food court on a busy day. But he needs to know how you feel. And where the boundries are.
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