A
male
age
36-40,
*omeplacecali1210
writes:Ok, let me see if I can get this all in. My step daughter and I have grown very close over the past year. She is a bit younger then I am (over 18). I can't help these feelings I am having for her. I have not told her about them and don't plan on it either (I am still married to her mother, that is another long story), but I have had some very vivid dreams about my step daughter, so vivid they seem real. How can I get rid of these feelings I have for her. I want to hold her, make love to her but I know I can't, but everytime I am around her, my heart beats faster and faster. I am pretty sure she doesn't feel the same way I do and I won't ever let her know how I feel, but it is tough knowing I want her, knowing I want to love her for life, but I also know it is wrong. How can I stop these feeling of love I have for her... Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2009): I think you should go with your feelings. You obviousily would rather be with the step daughter than her mother. Life is too short to wonder what if, you know?
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2009): Do not ever act on this. Just deal with it. She is not the last temptation you will have. Before you act, just ask yourself: "What can harm me the least?"
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  + ♥, writes (4 November 2009):
I agree with old guy. Look at your marriage and consider counselling to understand what is wrong with it. Are you still feeling loved, or is it feeling like your marriage needs a bit of a boost. Look at that, but don't ever make a move on your step daughter (I'm sure you won't)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2009): You might start by turning your attention to your marriage. If you had a healthy and fulfilling relationship with your wife, you wouldn't be mooning over her daughter. You might think about starting counselling -- alone at first, so you can talk about this inappropriate fixation without your wife hearing about it.
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A
female
reader, superdolly +, writes (4 November 2009):
If your marriage is unhappy end it now. This isn't fair on your wife. Would you want someone staying with you but lusting after somebody else? Because it would also be unfair to jepardise the relationship between mother and daughter. If you have been happy this may just be a crush and crushes fade but you will have to distract yourself. Maybe you and your wife could take a vacation and get away from her. You shouldn't be like ashamed or anything after all we are human its our basic nature. I think you really need to distance yourself from your stepdaughter, but not from your wife.If you can't get her out of your head think about something else or talk to someone you can trust even post something on this website as a distraction. You're not a bad person but you can't do anything because im sure you love your wife in a way and im sure that you deeply care about your stepdaughter and you wouldnt want either of them hurting. i hope i could helpgo some place nice and empty your head
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A
female
reader, Anonymous_NF  + ♥, writes (4 November 2009):
 Well, you see, in this case you shouldn't focus on that what you want, but on that what is best for you, for your wife and your step daughter. Try doing something new and exiting with your wife, make it fun to be around her. Maybe it will give your marriage a boost for the good. You must focus on that.I hope I could help you a bit.Good luck.
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