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I find myself attracted to him, I would never act on anything though, I love my partner too much but what the hell is going on???

Tagged as: Dating, Friends, Three is a crowd<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (23 February 2008) 2 Answers - (Newest, 23 February 2008)
A female age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I've been with my boyfriend for a year and a half and am deeply happy. However I used to be really good friends with his friend, I had a really close friendship with this persn as i knew him before I got with my b/f.

I knew he liked me more than a friend but I stressed on mutiple occasions, he was my friend and my feeling would never change.

He walked me home one night, me and bf had an arguement and he tried to kiss me, I ended our friendship and I was so gutted.

We didn't talk for six months (mind you he works up the road from me and I saw him every day) I found out he was entering in to an arraged marriage, left to live with his new wife. My bf said he wanted to talk to me before he left but didn't and I was gutted.

He's back for a few weeks working with my bf, but hasn't spoken to me, I keep dreaming about him, I keep remembering the time and conversations we had and every time I see him I have nervous butterflies in my stomach, I find myself attracted to him, I would never act on anything though, I love my partner too much but what the hell is going on??????????

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A reader, anonymous, writes (23 February 2008):

Hi Hunny

He was is a close friend feelings of love can get confussing sometimes and you are thinking about him because you are wondering maybe if you did the right thing. But this thought is just a thought. You deep down no you are happy but you just cant get it out of your head at this moment, It will pass love and you will realise that it was a feeling that at this time you couldnt control but you are normal as if you love someone as a friend and he had feelings for you it can pop up out of the blue that what would have happened if you had acted on those feeling when you were single.

DONT WORRY THIS WILL PASS! Our lives change and we do sometimes think what if! Thats natural, I could think of a few what ifs right now but I wont :) be happy with your man this will be ok in the end TAKE CARE OF YOU SWEETPEA LOTS OF LOVE N HUGS MANDY XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

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A male reader, Dr. John United States +, writes (23 February 2008):

Dr. John agony auntIt sounds to me like you are dealing the "What if" syndrome.

Is is much the same as if a guy sees a woman completely nude and leaves little to the imagination and does realatively little to excite him. However, leave on a slightly revealing negligee and his excitement level goes through the ceiling because now the imagination is at work trying to fill in the blanks.

In your case though, it sounds like your subconcious mind is saying; "What if?"

You are unconciously thinking; "I wonder what a relationship with him would have been like?" Your mind is put to work on the subject and getting several facets of your mind working on trying to fill in the blanks. Doc

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