A
male
age
13-15,
anonymous
writes:I have a issue thats beginning too ruin my life. I am so self conscious about my belly being a little pudgy that the 4 of July party I just came from(like 20 minutes ago)sucked because I was too nervous too go swimming with everyone else.I ended up just sitting on the couch the entire time, and I left before they even started too set up the fireworks.What should i do? Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2008): dont be too self-concois, your only young, and you can always wsear a t shirt when you swim i know alot of guys who do. also if you want to you can jsut do like a few crunches everyday to help tone your stomach, but dont get too obsessed, your only young and your body is still developing. :) good luck
A
female
reader, MissRosie  +, writes (5 July 2008):
 I can really sympathise with insecurities about appearance. However, the thing to remember is that you are seeing your own flaws magnified a thousand times compared to how other people see them. Most people will not even have noticed your supposed pudgyness. We really are our own worst critics so try to not let it interfere with your social life and having fun.
Take care x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2008): I'm sorry that you missed out on all the fun, it is terrible to be so concerned about how your body looks. The best advice is to give yourself a break, don't be so hard on yourself. No-one is perfect and we all think way too much that people won't like us because of something physical, but the truth is personalities are way more important than bodies.
Ask yourself this, do you know someone that everbody seems to like and is always the hit of the party? Is that person movie star perfect? Probably not, it is just that they are fun. If you however are always sitting in a corner people will notice that way more than if your belly sticks out a little. Wear a t-shirt and tell folks your skin burns easily and then focus on having fun.........also, stop looking and watching things that focus on how beautiful people are..it is called objectifying. Basically you look at people as you would an object and then you qualify their legs, butt, chest ... piece by piece. When you do that you eventually start doing it to yourself, not good. People are more than just body parts, look deeper ...... are they funny, loyal, good cooks, do they make you laugh and feel good about yourself? When you learn to see the whole person you are able to look at yourself as a whole person as well...it takes practice, but you will get the hang of it and feel better about yourself as well.
Good luck and HAVE FUN
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A
male
reader, q1605 +, writes (5 July 2008):
 Before I learned the error of my ways I drank so much beer that when they figured alcohol consumption stats for the state of Texas they would list me in my own category because to not segregate me was to skew all the other data into meaningless numbers. After maybe twenty five years or so of this I was getting a little bit, but still hardly noticeable thickening of the middle section. You can treat your body like the temple that it is and eventually it will all roll out. Or you can wear a size or two bigger t-shirt or hawaiian shirt and camouflage it. Keep it on when you jump in the water. They may look at you funny today, but tomorrow when they look like a lobster boiling in a pot they will give you a pass. And you stand out way worse sitting by yourself than you would joining in on the fun.When your a kid you just know every one is staring at you and really no one gives a shit. Well at your age they may be. If you are not projecting some sort of coolness but that's no stretch. Just act like you would act if nobody but your close friends were there. You can only draw undo attention by trying extremely hard to draw it to you, or by painfully trying to avoid it. Your body language will betray you every time. The rule is// feel like a dork....look like a dork.... feel comfortable in your own skin .... look comfortable and poised. Embrace the non dork in you. I see you doing stand up one day. How cool is that?
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