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I feel like the most boring, ugliest, most bitter person ever! What do I do about it?

Tagged as: Dating, Friends, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (3 May 2009) 3 Answers - (Newest, 4 May 2009)
A female age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I don't know whether I'm depressed or what. But I don't feel ok. I don't feel very happy. Ok, so let's see.

This has been happening for a while, but usually I feel bad because of boredom and because I feel I lack something. I have some hobbies but I guess I feel bad that I don't know many people.

I love my boyfriend. He loves me. We have a great relationship. However I feel bad because I can't connect with his friends. Last night he took me to a party and I was very bored because I felt out of place. I felt boring because I had nothing to say. well, they were talking about things I had no idea about. They've all known each other for at least 5 years, so I'm not part of that "history".

I'm very envious. I don't know why, but I feel envy a lot of the time, particularly about other girls' looks.

This got worse this week. I had a lot of things to do at the uni. I'm a teacher's helper and I had to prepare a lesson. I had tons of papers to hand in. I had to attend meetings (I'm head of the Student's Council). I barely slept this week...

And today I woke up feeling down and sad, and like I don't want to do anything but tomorrow I have to go back to the uni and I don't feel like it. I don't want to do anything! But I have to... plus my self esteem is low for all the reasons I named above...

Am I depressed? What should I do? I feel like the most boring, ugliest (inside and out), bitter person ever! But I don't know what to do about it...

View related questions: depressed, self esteem

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A male reader, Polite Fellow United Kingdom +, writes (4 May 2009):

hey, i find you fascinating and i don't know you so you're not boring or stupid because you have written how you feel and your problem in such a way that i enjoyed reading it and felt how deep a person you are.

And hey, i am boring ugly and stupid but as happy as can be.

You can't let not feeling as though you got on with someone else's friends, getting to know people takes time, making friends takes time and the guys you were out with won't judge you for it. Its something we've all done, stood around saying very little because we didn't know how to connect. you'll find with time that connection will build.

Also i think everyone around your age goes through some sort of depression whether it is just adjusting to becoming an adult, the stress or responsibilities and fear of the future and who you will become. Just be yourself and let others like you for it, and if they don't, who needs them.

not you lovey, you're too good.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 May 2009):

Wow! I am feeling the same way today! And yes, I believe it is slight depression.

A good friend of mine has reminded me how blessed I am...not in words, but in his actions.

When I am feeling this way...I know myself well enough not to "sit in my shit." I have to suround myself with positive, happy, people. The ones that care the most! I am blessed to have so many people who love and care about me! And I have to remember to be grateful for those people and eliminate the negative garbage from my head. Even when it is my own voice telling me life sucks!

Take time to look at the positive things in life! You will feel better!

Good Luck and Have a Happy Day!

Britt!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 May 2009):

everybody feel like they are boring or ugly or stupid but its not true. you're lucky to have a loving boyfriend and so what if u dont fit in with his friends? just talk about him and maybe you'll get stories about his past or talk about uni. as for the paperwork, just keep ur head down and get on with it so u can have a relaxing day off.

i suggest going out and buying something new, like a stylish outfit or a new haircut so u feel better. if u think u look good, u will feel good. even when ur not happy, just smile anyway. its amazing how simple it is to brighten up a bit. have a girly day out or a warm bath to relax u. maybe take up a sport like swimming or an adrenaline sport like rock climbing to make u feel alive.

dont worry, be happy :)

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