A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My Husband has been feeling really guilty about things and its driving me crazy. I am 27 and have a 3m son and 2 stepgrls 10 and 13. We got married 1yr 1/2ago and didn't get a chance to be newlyweds i became stepmom. He gets the grls every 2 wks. and when i do things like put a dollar a day in my son's he feels bad bcuz he didn't do it 4 the grls. On Our 1st aniv. his daughter called and he didn't tell her we were on our aniv. because he said he never to her on a vacation he feels bad telling her, and on Mother's day he gave me a bracelet and told me not to tell his mom he bought it be cause he feels bad he can't do that for his mom. I feel like i am in the dark. We fought and i kicked him out ad told him to come back when he appreciates me. I feel like he puts his kids and mom first than me.Could I be just emotional from post-partum or is he in the wrong for making me feel like this?
View related questions:
his ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, mcbirdie  +, writes (19 May 2007):
 It is certainly possible that you are rightfully emotional after the birth of your child. It is also very possible that you and your husband have a problem that you need to sort out. It is normal that he feel guilty about the differences between how it was when his children were born, with how it is with your children and it is normal for you to feel competitive and left out--but what is more needed than 'throwing someone out' is a serious discussion.
You need to talk to him about your insecurities, not just make unclear demands like "appreciate you". And he needs to feel he can talk to you about his guilt--which I doubt he feels he can if you are throwing him out without conversation.
Marriages are hard work; this is just your first hurdle to get over.
Best of luck.
|
