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female
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anonymous
writes: My husband and I move in with his relatives and his nephew already caught my eye, like an instant casting spell. True this is not a good sign...but the plot thickens or the sexual tension or chemistry is there.Sure the nephew comes around more often since we moved in...Gives his hugs and at one point I wondered if the nephew was purposely waiting for me to kiss him on his cheek...which I did.The Nephew would call the house, and when I answered for the first time and did not realize it was the nephew I was aroused v=by his voice and I must have gotten carried away with his vocal sound and didn't even know it, until I just made it sound like a complimnet other than having anyone read more into it.At the family Christmas Party, We headed to his mother's house where he still resides, we were the only 2 down in the family room while everyone else was upstairs socializing and preparing the Christmas feast.Meanwhile, the nephew lays down on the couch and winks at me, I did make a remark that he definately has the right idea, the nephew looks at me and gestures a more seductive way with an eyebrow raise and scoots his body over to make room for mine to lay next to his.I told him if I didn't have to dress up and venture out and about after they're Christmas dinner and if no one was around,I would probably take his invitation and join him.Sure he smiled and there was another time that crossed my mind, while my hubby and I were out and stayed overnight to a friends house party, we had come home by mid morning to find the nephew in our bed sleeping. That morning, my spouse had to run off to work and I was tempted to slip into my bed next to the nephew, because I was where I could not sleep comfortably through the night before.I chose not to and rather, leave my blouse open for when the nephew would wake up he can get a peek of what he might or might not want.I did tell the nephew that I almost joined him that morning, the nephew told me that he would not have minded and that I should have.The family was playing with this 8 ball where you ask it a queston and while holding it for a few moments it gives you an answer...I asked the 8 ball if I had a secret admirer, before the 8 ball appeared the answer "Yes" The nephew blurted out that I do. I looked at him and asked How did he know that?He smiled, winked and then shrugged. It was cute and made me feel aroused and good inside and out.But this is getting more complicated than it needs to be.No question really, just more like I needed to vent this out to people who want to tell me that I am just wrong or how could I lead this kind of life.Doesn't matter how you as the reader takes it...or if you wish to respond, by all means....voice your opinion, am I reading into the nephew too much or what is going on here, we are 18 years apart and the last names are totally differnt.Sure thing would be under incest and leaning toward consenual adult sex, yet were all human and why else would there be a Dear Cupid page where people like us can vent out to those were not intending to hurt, just venting out to find our way to get some direction.Reply but also understand no one is perfect.
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male
reader, eddie  + ♥, writes (7 January 2008):
 It sounds like you're going through a difficult time. The question you posted made it sound like you did not care about what was going on. You say that sugar coating our answers would be better. Why is that? Sugar coating does not make things better. You've chosen to minimize this problem and discuss it like it's a game. It's not a game, it's rel life. If you know what yo're doing is wrong, sugar coating is jst fooling yourself. You need to hear the blunt truth.
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSure it's flattering to the attention, that I am getting and may have acted upon it in a subtle just a bit...not really acting on it...and oh hell no, I would not "do it" with anytihng or anyone in sight who will give me the time or day! It was just something that came across my mind, something that I can not vent out to a close friend or family; you got the gist of that and I thank you all for submitting your opinion.
I gather this is where people like myself goto to vent out situations like or is a sticky mess or even worse happenings that already occured..Granted I took this upon myself to post this and ask you..Nope not sorry that I asked, I am thankful, just don't need the cruel remarks or sarcasium for the thought of just being human of something that was on my mind.
I am sure there are others with much more serious situations that have puzzled you and have you made or passed judement upon those who have asked for your help or opinions?
Whether you chose to answer any question on this site from me or anyone else, think of how much courage it took them to post it and then think about how you really don't know how fragile the person on the other end is looking forward to your response, they may have done or thought wrong, but please take into consideration that maybe if you can be more sugar coated and truthful...oh nevermind, if you really don't care or can not answer without being realistic or really know what is going on you should ask the person more questions relating to their situation or if they would like to share their personal email with you on this cry for help from a stranger or agony aunt that is really willing to lend caring support.
Blah, Blah , Blah....I know, maybe I am just wrong for asking or even thanking you.
At any expense, it doesn't really hurt to ask for help nor should it hurt to read to reply or be nasty to the person whose doesn't have anywhere else to turn to ask.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
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A
male
reader, eddie + ♥, writes (31 December 2007):
This is just plain terrible and you're getting some kind of cheap thrill out of it. who cares if you get aroused...big deal. Are you going to screw every person you meet who arouses you? Not only are you playing a game behind your husbands back, you've chosen to play with a family member. That just makes it worse as you'll see this person for the rest of your married life. And by the way, you've already been cheating emotionally and you've made your husband look like a chump. The truth is though, he's not the chump. You and his nephew are the villains here.
People often do things that hurt other people. What you're doing is too close to home and certain to cause extra pain. You should both be ashamed
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female
reader, sexylover0017  +, writes (31 December 2007):
Hope you make the right decision not to do anything with him. Think about your husband and how hurt he will be when he finds out. You and your husband made vows and you should stay true to those. Think about all the wonderful times you and your husband have had; the first day you guys met or the day you just knew you loved him- the day he purposed to you. Think about your wedding day and how happy you were to say 'I Do'. Your husband loves you and always will. You and that 'kid' need to stay away from each other as much as possible. God is testing you- I will pray you dont fail. Good Luck
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male
reader, Friend Tom + ♥, writes (31 December 2007):
 You say that "nothing has happened". Good on that point. Don't let it happen. It is normal to have "attractions", but remember who you are and who he is. And you are the elder party here, evidently, so you must use the best judgement. I thought my S/O's younger sister was "adorable" when I first met her. But she was adorable in a very different sense than what I felt for S/O. We have to behave like adults in order to call ourselves adults.
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A
female
reader, birdynumnums + ♥, writes (31 December 2007):
 There are people who manage to remain faithful throughout their marriages, but it is a choice. What you failed to say about this consensual act is that it is an Adulterous Insestual act and simply mentioning that it is consensual merely means that you both agree to do this to your husband in spite of your marriage. It's perfectly fine to flirt, but know when and where to draw the boundaries if you have any intention of remaining married. It's perfectly normal to have crushes too, but just because you feel something, doesn't mean that you have to act on it! It's more than possible that this flirtatious ego-trip could have a bigger price tag than you are willing to pay. Don't forget, should you "win" the object of your affections, he comes with the same set of relatives, and where would you be then? Yikes!
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all who have submitted your opinions and it does help, when I really can not tell anyone not even a best friend or even family, you have all guided me into the right direction and I just hope that New Year's Eve Party won't be such a total disaster, the nephew will be there. It's a family event and I must attend, because I am also invited as I am also family.
Thanks again and Happy New Year!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2007): In the real world, its just wrong. You are playing with fire and you are going to get burned. I am not a judgmental person but I also have a decent heart. What you are doing is despicable. I mean if you want attention go get it somewhere else. Out with your girlfriends at a pub. But NOT from your husbands own family member in his own family's house. That's just scandalous. And just pathetic. That's just MEAN to the point that its weird.
And the person you are hurting the most is yourself. Trust me, that kid probably has no respect for you. He might do it with you but he is going to think you are scandalous. He'll probably have sex with you and then tell all his friends about it and tell them about all your imperfections, may even make fun of you if he hasn't already. Guys are MEAN especially at that age. In fact I guarantee you he has already made fun of you to all his friends.
Not to mention your husbands family is going to hate you. You are just setting yourself up to be hated by alot of people. And word gets around. People will find out.
And you are right that no one is perfect. But what you are doing has nothing to do with not being perfect. You are just callous.
What you should do is start acting like an adult. But if you don't, the only person you are truly hurting is yourself.
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A
female
reader, maddierose  +, writes (31 December 2007):
 I completely understand that nobody is prefect and sometimes people can not help but have a sexual attraction to people. But your nephew purely likes the attention he is getting from you but as a younger male, it's flattering. And so he encourages it. But sometimes (as you are more experianced) he can talk the talk, but when it came down to walking the walk, he would be scared. leading to embarresment for you and further family conflicts. I would snap out of it if i were you, it could cause way too many problems. The only thing he is thinking about is his ego, and that is not fair on you.
Hope this has helped.
Btw i tried to see this as 2 people not as an aunty and a nephew. but from that point of veiw, as a neice, i would never want to sleep with my uncle for the pure fact that he has slept with my aunty. enough said there.
But i will not judge as attraction works in mysterious ways. but i would say that as a himan and a human, this could cause you emotional disfunction and pain for you and any members of your family if it was ever found out. And for you personally as this could never work.
Hope this helped.
=)
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A
female
reader, SoSowhat10 +, writes (31 December 2007):
 Well, I will give you 2 voices from me, my angel voice who is a complete God woman and my devil voice who is the kinkiest bitch out there in the streets who will hump anything sexy. Angel: Don't do it because your married and would really hurt your husband. Stay away from your nephew if you really value your marriage. Devil: Get'em girl. I mean do your husband really have to know and maybe it would be good and might make your marriage stronger if you let off a little steam and got your feet wet..Don't you love your husband enough to always know where home is even if you do stray away like a measly cat...
Anyways it's your choice and nobody elses...I wish you well.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2007): firstly i say grow up and stop behaving like a love sick teen,secondly you do know that if you continue this you could destroy a whole family and your marriage,are you really prepared for the fireworks and the outcome?why destroy what you have for a teenagers crush
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