A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I feel so heartbroken right now, I have told my ex I want nothing more to do with him as I can't take the emotional torment anymore.Wee wee were together for four years and in that time wee have had some really good times but really really bad times as well.Like he would plan days out for us and make me smile that way, or buy me little gifts and things like that.Then when I needed him he refused to be there for me, my Gran passed and I needed his support but he told me to go away. Which utterly broke me.There's several other things kike that.I don't want to sound ungrateful as gifts and trips are lovely, but I'd rather be sitting in a bin shed with someone who wants to hold my hand when my world falls apart than. I have told him this a million times and it never changed.Now I accept nothing in hope he just seen all I wanted was him to be around when I needed him, no need for his wallet so to speak.I've seen him show such affection online to celebrities and it does sting me like why can't he speak to me like that? Instead of a stranger who will never know him?My ex has now told he doesn't want to be with me, I told him okay i accept that. No further questions and confusion required. However he started crying when I said I accept and please let me move on with no calls thank you.Can someone please help me make sense of this please ?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2024): Don't feel guilty about the treats. He wasn't able to meet your emotional needs and OK he got upset but as you said, you need someone who is emotionally there for you. It's hard to break up even from a bad relationship so please reach out to family and friends if you can. It's also possible to get counselling free via the doctor if you feel you need it.
A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (12 March 2024):
 I'm so sorry for your loss of your grandma.
I think your EX has issues with intimacy (not the "sexy kind") but the interpersonal kind.
Breaking up IS the best choice, he isn't what you WANT in a partner.
Buying gifts and spending money isn't very personal at all. ANYONE can do that. Maybe that is HOW he has been taught to show love in the past.
Making you a cup of tea and giving you some Kleenex while you cry over the loss of your grandmother, that IS personal.
"I've seen him show such affection online to celebrities "
Mo that isn't affection that was him putting on a show of affection to make him SEEM like a better man than he really is. Those were words, again, ANYONE can type things and make them seem heartfelt and caring.
His words and his actions just don't match.
He is emotionally stunted.
Wish him well, block delete and move on.
Find your guy who can be a better match.
Stop trying to figure this guy out. Let him go. You are not his therapist, you are his EX gf.
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