A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I have been dating a lot since my divorce. I am meeting all types of guys but not the right one.. It has been a long, lonely road..A friend told me about a single guy and gave him my number. I waited a few weeks and he did not call. So, I called him very casually. He called me back we had a very nice conversation. he followed up with a text,i replied maybe we can meet for a drink sometime. We have talked on the phone a couple more times and the conversation flows smoothly. He lives two hours away. I texted him and said I am excited to meet in person. The weekend is approaching and I do not have plans with him. I have hinted I want to meet and the ball is in his court. I enjoy the company of a man so much. How long do I wait for him to approach me to go on a date. I do not want to wait for an emotionally unavailable man.. Please help me ..
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female
reader, Hollyhock  +, writes (27 May 2013):
You have made it clear to him that you're interested and have put the ball in his court. He knows that you would like to see him again. Right now there is nothing you can do but wait to see if he contacts you. If he's interested and wants to see you he will contact you.
You must not chase him. if he wants to see you he will contact you and will make plans to see you. Contacting him again to see what the plans for this weekend are will only chase him away. We all run from whatever it is that it chasing us, this is doubly so in the case of men when a woman is chasing them.
Keep dating other men, there are others out there who you will be just as attracted to and the right one will move hell and high water to make sure that he spends time with you.
I know this is hard - I have been in this position myself very recently. But if you do contact him and make plans to see him you'll never know if he really wanted to see you or if he was just being polite. If he contacts you and asks to see you then you'll know for sure that he wants to spend time with you. And if he doesn't contact you to make plans you'll also know for sure that he's not interested.
I agree with the poster who recommended the Two books - they are both excellent and will help you to work your way through the pitfalls of meeting a new man and they will show you the right steps to take.
I hope this helps.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 August 2010): Ok keep doing.. But i do not know why you agree for divorce? if you needed a man so badly. Once you did, wait for next Man wisely, else i am sure you do not want a second failure in life.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 August 2010): Read these two books as they will prevent alot of your dating grief:
' Why men marry bitches' and
' He's just not that into you'.
Never chase a guy. If he's interested he'll bend over backwards to be with you.
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A
female
reader, OhGetReal +, writes (26 August 2010):
 You know it sounds like you put the ball in his court by telling him you were excited to meet in person and he hadn't asked you to meet yet.....so you are going to come off as over eager or desperate if you keep contacting him.
If he doesn't call or ask you out, I am afraid he just isn't interested. Quite frankly, it could be the two hour commute that is turning him off the most, not you.
Although, I think there is nothing wrong in going out and having fun with him when he is in town, I wouldn't be driving to see him unless things got serious down the road, which is more difficult considering that you are starting out getting to know each other long distance. Perhaps you can just put him in the friend category and talk to him on occassion while dating more local men.
I wouldn't throw in the towel on dating other men, it only takes one mister right to change things from all those Mr. Right Nows....Have fun.
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