A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Not sure why I can't get this off my mind or why it bothers me! My husband and I have been together for 3 years; married for 1 year. A few months ago the topic of threesomes came up. At which time he said he had one with both of his ex's (g/f and wife). Both were serious long term relationships and he had children with both. Both times it was MMF and he says they had suggested. With the agreement that it would lead into a MFF in the future, which it never did.Out of curiosity I asked if we could and what his thoughts were about us having a threesome. I even suggested MFF. Which he told me no and said he didn't want to. However, if I wanted another guy to do me...I could and he'd watch but not participate as he did the other two times. Why would he be okay with this???A threesome is something I would never really do but the fact that he said no has me puzzled! I feel we have a great sex life and he seems to agree. But? This isn't the only thing that's come up to make his past sex life seem a little adventurous. I feel like maybe I'm doing something wrong? Maybe he's not as turned on sexually by me as he was by those of his past? Now he avoids the subject and won't answer any of my questions when I try to bring the subject up. I'm slightly confused...any opinions, thoughts, etc.?
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his ex, sex life, threesome Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, idoneitagain  +, writes (26 March 2009):
There are many possibilities. Some of which include:
- he was testing you.
- he wants to please you and find out if you are interested
- he might have a fetish for watching other guys sleep with his partner. Some people do experience this.
The best thing to do is tell him what you want, and find out what he wants, and you say you have done the former and are trying the latter without success.
Instead of starting by asking him the questions you ask, tell him how you feel about him avoiding the issue. Tell him its something you want to be able to talk about. He may be afraid of your response, but if its a conversation you really want to have, you can help him overcome his fear.
Good luck.
A
female
reader, 48years  +, writes (26 March 2009):
 Your man may have been testing you to see if he alone satisfies you. Otherwise, how is it possible that this never came up before you got married? Just suppose he asked because he's so freakingly jealous and wants to see what you'd say. Most men prefer FFM.
And BTW, I've yet to hear of a healthy successful relationship that endured a threesome and survived. Even your guy, if what he said was true, left the two previous gals despite indulging in a threesome.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you both for your input.
To Angel Eyes I did suggest another women...he still said no.
Fancy yourself I understand what you're saying as that did go through my mind. But why the other guy just no participation from my husband?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2009): Hi
He's been there...done it...........maybe he knows the outcome!
you could be opening up a can of worms if you push....
be thankful your man only wants you.
via con dios.
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