A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:This will be long sorry...I have been spending a lot of time with this guy from college we do the same subject and we will be flat mates from september so i will see him a lot! From the start of the year we were attracted to eachother but took a little while to admit this to eachother, we would flirt and text and meet up (this went on for months) but then twice he backed away and said it wasn't a good idea or that he was scared of relationships. However now we are doing it again...I know I have been foolish for continuing the cycle but I cant help it we seem so right for eachother, recently we have spent even more time with eachother watching films having dinner going to the park. We are also physically close we cuddle or wrestle and have been sexual with eachother (but not everytime we meet up). I have such strong feelings for him and I think he does too but I dont know if he will ever want to be boyfriend/girlfriend. I am finding it so hard to try and get over him or just not think about him, but I cant. We have said that it might not be a good idea to fool around when we live together but I dont know if we will stick to that and I know that I want to be with him, its so hard! It is summer break so I wont be seeing him til september and i miss him so much it kills, I just want to know if there is any hope for us or if I am just fooling myself. He has had relationship issues in the past, and he has told me that he doesnt do casual relationships. He also said once that the next relationship he has he wants it to be the one that lasts (he is older than me). I says he loves me as a friend but that he is also attracted to me so i dont understand, as far as i can tell we would be perfect for eachother, but the fact we are living together has him scared. Please give me some advice i am driving myself crazy!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 June 2010): ive been in this situation and it is hard. it will hurt more then ever when he goes away but it will also help you. you need to tell him straight and not let him take you for mug. if he uses his past relationships as an excuse then i suggest however hard it may be but to walk away and say well sorry im looking for a relationship. if he doesnt accept this he is clearly not worth your time. ive been in a similar situation too you, my boyfriend broke up with me too clear his head but then when i seen him he acted as if we were still together, cuddling, watching films and sexual intercourse. i let it happen because i feared if i said no i would lose him completely, but thinking about it now its ot worth letting him walk all over me. it will hurt alot trying to get over him but i think its best you say no unless its a relationship. i hope this can help.
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