A
female
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:A couple days ago I was hanging out with a couple of my friends, and my boyfriend at school durring lunch. He wispered "I love you" in my ear then lead me out to a secluded place neer the edge of school field. We were just making out, and he went to go put his hand 'down there' and I told him not too. He almost started begging... and I started walking away, but then he turned me around and we started kissing again. I thought that would just be it, kissing. But then he took my hands in his, and I just thought he was wanting to hold my hands... he started to bring my hands closer to 'down there' on him. I didn't know what to do, so I started rubbing him through his pants. I got scared, so I just said we should get back, and I walked away. I don't know what I should have done, or what I should do if I get into that situation again... and just so you know, I didn't want to do it, to touch him. Not at all. I just don't know how to say "No." Please, any advise ?
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female
reader, advisegiver6489  +, writes (16 November 2012):
 Do not do Anything that makes you feel uncomfortable. You will regret your decision and yourself. No means no and if he don't understand that then he don't deserve you!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 November 2012): Well done OP. There's nothing scary about saying no. It sounds like he gets the message and respects that too.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 November 2012): It's me. I'm not logged in, but I want to add more info on recent events.
Just today, not even an hour ago my boyfriend tried to do it again, and thank you everyone for your advise!
He took me back to the same place by the edge of the field, and he tried to touch me. I said no, but more firmly this time, cause last time I only asked him and pulled his hand away. After a couple of minutes he tried to pull my hand down to him again and I just kept my hands around his neck. he tried to force my hands apart, and put my hands down there, and I said "don't force me to do something that I don't want to." I actually didn't believe I had that much power over a situation. After that he just let it be :) Thanks you again everybody!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2012): Let me start with, well done for saying NO the first time. You are very brave for knowing what it is you want, and to ask for advice on how to handle the pressure is a big step and one that I respect.
Honey you tell this boy that you are not at all ready for this step your very young and you have your whole world ahead of you. Do not let some silly teenage boy with silly hormones running through his body pressure you in to anything.
If he continues this behaviour he his showing you he does not respect you. And therefore he is not worth your time.
My daughter is 14, she was faced a similar problem with her boyfriend. She went to him and told him that it was not to happen agian, she was only 14 and while she understands he has alot going on, so does she and if he can not understand that she is not at all ready for this step, they would not stay together, but if he could respect her then they would stay together, she has more respect for her self and her body. Her boyfriend said he is sorry and he just wants to be with her, if she is not ready then he is not ready.
I hope this helps you honey, stay strong say NO and don't do ANYTHING that YOU ARE NOT READY FOR, do not let ANYONE pressure you for force you.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (11 November 2012):
 You say "no". Have a stern talk with your "boyfriend" again. If he truly is your boyfriend, and not just a guy who is using you for sex, then he will respect your no and NOT beg, or attempt to try it on again after you've said NO.
This action from your "boyfriend" indicated he is not a boyfriend, but just a guy who is trying to USE you for sex. Tell him what you expect from a boyfriend: respect.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (11 November 2012):
You always just say 'no', then go somewhere where it's a bit more public. To be honest, he was probably being a stupid horny teenager, but if he tries this again when you say 'no', then he's not to be trusted.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2012): OP you know what we call girls who never learn to say 'no'? We call them 'easy' because they let any guy who tries do whatever they like to them. But you seem to be confused OP, you can say 'no' because you did when he tried to touch you. So you are capable of refusing, you just have be firm every time.
Now you have a bigger issue here OP, your boyfriend is being to frisky and putting too much pressure on you. If he wasn't a teenager I'd say he's a douche but most teenage boys are frisky and do the pressure thing.
Now unless you want this guy constantly doing this kind of thing to you, constantly pestering you to go too far then you have to be stronger, if he tries you push his hand away and you tell him not to. If he starts begging you walk away every time and tell him you won't keep seeing a boy who pressures you into this kind of thing.
OP stop thinking you're weak or that you can't say no, you can say no and you did say no, you just bowed to pressure the second time and that's okay, just be a bit stronger in your convictions next time and stop rewarding his childish begging and pestering by giving him what he wants or he will keep doing it and you'll be very unhappy.
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A
male
reader, bluewarrior911 +, writes (11 November 2012):
 Honestly...a person who truly loves you would not "force" you to do anything that you do not want to do. I think the next time he puts your hand in his pants, you should grab his penis and yank it off, because he does not deserve to have one (kidding).Just tell him..."No!" If he persists, then break it off with him. Why would you want to be with someone who does not respect you.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2012): "Any advice?"Break up with your boyfriend before he knocks you up with a kid you are completely incapable of raising because you don't know how to say "no," and don't go out with any guy until you learn to say "no." "What should I have done?"You should have said "no" and got up and walked away. "How can I say no?"Ask any random two-year-old. Seriously, if you are so intimidated by or afraid of saying "no" to a horny teenage guy, then you are way, way too immature to be playing boyfriend and girlfriend, and being too immature is far different than being too young.
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