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I could use some advice before he drives me completely nuts! Is he stringing me along?

Tagged as: Teenage, The ex-factor, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (13 July 2008) 2 Answers - (Newest, 14 July 2008)
A female age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I am [or should say, was] with a highly oversensitive and passive-agressive guy for several months. It got very serious fairly quickly, and stayed that way until I mentioned that I hated someone he was close to, and a week or two later said something else without thinking that he took seriously. This was six weeks ago. He says we're currently friends and he needs time before things can get back to normal [something he said about two weeks ago, maybe a little longer], and granted, we've been arguing about it since then, and I may have been a lot pushier than I should have. But at this point things are more strained than ever and he's pissing me off. I know I was wrong but I'm sick of trying to apologize and make things right when he just gets irritated by it. Should I give him two or three more weeks to calm down without asking or trying to argue about it, or is this idiot just screwing with me and telling me things will get back to normal when he knows damned well they won't?

Personally, I think he is screwing with me due to the sheer amount of time he's taking.. six weeks with no end in immediate sight seems ridiculous. But then again, he and I are complete opposites on the "getting over issues" front, I don't really know what he's thinking. Not to mention if I were completely convinced he was stringing me along there's no way I'd still be in contact with him [I have NO interest whatsoever in keeping up some one-sided bullshit attempt at friendship], and as embarrassing as it is I still care for this guy. Could use some advice before he drives me completely nuts.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (14 July 2008):

Never be with somone you are not happy with. there are so much better men out there. This guy just sounds like a wierdo (no offeense) If you really like him just be freinds. I know it sounds like cliche b.s. but it sometimes works.

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A female reader, birdynumnums Canada +, writes (14 July 2008):

birdynumnums agony auntWhy are you hanging on to the thought of continuing an on-again-off-again relationship with a guy who is obviously driving you bonkers?

Oh, wait, Are you guys already married?

Sorry... Cheap joke.

Okay. Ya, Sorry. If a relationship has this rough a beginning, you kind of have to think that it isn't meant to be. Really, there has to be more common ground And an easier rapore between the two of you than This. There isn't much to build on, otherwise. The chemistry, interest and desire to communicate with each other has to be there before you get serious.

That's the reason why you should wait to get really involved and take things slow. To figure out if there actually is a relationship. You wouldn't be the first person to make this mistake and you won't be the last. There doesn't seem to be much of a desire on his part here, and like you said, he's just driving you nuts. I'd start trying to forget that you even crossed paths and start to move on...

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