A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have this male best friend. We've known each other for close to 3 years now. At the time, i felt this connection with him like i had never felt with any other guy before, and surprise surprise, found myself slowly falling for him and thinking he would be the one. I've confessed my love to him once, but he told me they were not corresponded at the time, and probably still aren't. We've remained friends though and acted like nothing happened ever since. The thing is, at the time, i convinced myself i would "get rid" of the feelings, but of course, that didn't happen. Lately, i find myself longing for him more and more, and it hurts. It hurts to think of him with someone else and it hurts to see him move on with his life without me being part of it. I don't know what to do anymore because if i confess that i have feelings for him again, things could get really awkward this time around and i don't want to lose him, but at the same time, i don't know what to do with these feelings. I know i can never be happy if i keep hanging on to him in hopes of something happening between us and i've passed on multiple opportunities this past year alone because he's the one who keeps popping into my mind. I get quite jealous of other female friends of him and end up imagining all kinds of scenarios between them, which makes me feel kind of childish and silly.So i came here, to pour my feelings into the world because i just needed to tell someone who would understand, and in hopes of someone offering me help as to what to do in this situation.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, malvern  + ♥, writes (3 January 2015):
 Unfortunately none of us can make somebody want us in the way we would like them too. This can happen to any us at any age and there isn't a damn thing you can do about it. This has happened to me and I know how heart breaking it is but you have to forget and you have to move on. One day somebody will come along who will love you to bits and it is then that you will realise that your male friend was never the one for you. You will tie your heart up in knots if you keep imagining things about other girls he meets. Ask yourself this 'Is he thinking about me? Is he sitting at home crying over me? Is he getting jealous if he sees me with somebody else?'. The answer is 'Probably not'. The chances are that he's out and about with his mates, having a good time and not even thinking about you, so don't waste your time thinking about him. Believe me, this is the best way to think because otherwise you will dig yourself into a little hole of misery.
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