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I cheated on my girlfriend. I feel real guilty. How can I get her trust back?

Tagged as: Cheating, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (9 September 2007) 2 Answers - (Newest, 9 September 2007)
A male United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

i cheated on my GF the other day, but i still love her alot! i was just rubbing this girls thigh (not in her pants) but my GF freaked when i told her, and shes a wreck. I feel soo bad and guilty, and even after she found out that it was above the pants (which she thought it was in the pants at first) she was more pissed off at me that i let her freak out over sumthing that wasnt even true. I dont know what to do! shes given me a second chance, but she says im only at about 55% trust level, but she loves me and doesnt want to let me go....

i need help on something, whats somthing really specail i could do for her, to gain back her trust, and show her that i still love her deeply!!

please help! i need to make her happy again!!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (9 September 2007):

Yeah, Hi. Okay, so i had the same thing happen between me and my boyfriend. After a couple of weeks, i still dont have his full trust back, but we're getting there.

I have to say one thing: you were honest, thats one thing. That shows you still love her and you didnt MEAN to hurt her (unless you did mean to cheat on her, then you need to talk with her about that...tell her why you did it.). otherwise, I think you should just talk to her. Let her know how you feel, that you didnt mean to hurt her, youre sorry. But dont let it go. Youll get that trust back as long as youre being honest. Believe me.

P.S. Its not gonna happen right away though...Give it time.

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A male reader, rcn United States +, writes (9 September 2007):

rcn agony auntI'd ask her if the 45% is because of the action, or her assumption you were down her pants. At lease you didn't go any further with this person. You should both sit and talk about what happened, without getting mad or freaking out. If you were meaning to cheat, there's a reason and it needs to be discussed. If it was an innocent action, that needs to be discussed as well. Don't let the issue just sit dormant. Trust issues that aren't dealt with grow.

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