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I can't have an orgasm, is there something wrong with me?

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Question - (26 July 2008) 5 Answers - (Newest, 26 July 2008)
A female United States age 30-35, *ellasmommy writes:

I cant have an orgasm!!! is somthing wrong with me?

OR is the sex not good or what!!?! im 20 and have a 1 yea r old child, and my boyfriend and i have been together for 3 years, and i have YET to have one.. is there something wrong?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2008):

Relax, I don't think you need to worry; not many women suffer from orgasmic impairment; what women often suffer from is an impaired partner;

Women often fail to achieve orgasm; not all women reach orgams everytime they have sex;

BUT every woman is capable of orgasm and can learn how to do it by MASTRUBASION.

Do you mastrubate? Do you reach orgams with matrubation?Do you know your own body well? Then, I suggest you need to teach your boyfriend what your preferences are; show him how to stimulate you; guide him and teach him;if he loves you, he will want to please you.

If you are not sure of what feels good and what arouses you; do a few small experiments when you have time; where and when you won't be disturbed; start by touching yourself all over; try to focus on what feels good and what is arousing you; stroke yourself with different types of touch(soft,slow, firm hard); Experiment and get to know your body; then guide your lover to do what feels good for you.

"Uncle Phil" has also given you some excellent tips.

Put some of the advice to practice and ENJOY!

Best wishes and lots of SMILES.

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A female reader, lexilou United Kingdom +, writes (26 July 2008):

lexilou agony auntIts more common for women not to orgasm so nothing is wrong.

You have to know your own body intimately if you have any hope of expecting your boyfriend to know which buttons to press. You need lots of foreplay etc before to make sure you are ready, then it is a case of experimenting with different angles and positions to see which ones get you closer to orgasm. You will also need to relax and not expect one as this could prevent it too. x

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A female reader, fab40 United States +, writes (26 July 2008):

Why would you think that anything would be wrong with you? Being with your boyfriend for 3 years I beleive that he is the one with the problem. If he hasn't been able to give you that orgasm that you have been so desperattly waiting for then he is the problem. Sweetie if that orgasm hasnt happen by now, it isn't going to happen. And, if you should ever cheat on your boyfriend and get that screaming orgasm, you better start packing. Because the one that makes you feel good is the one you would want to be with.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2008):

Maybe you're trying too hard, you're too tensed up or maybe he's not trying hard enough and leaving you high and dry.

You have to find out what feels really good and keep doing it. Try going on top then you can position yourself for best effect. Sit astride him facing him and lean back a bit, placing your hands on his thighs for support, which isn't a bad way of hitting the 'G' spot.

The clitoris - the 'little man in a boat', and 'G' spot are the main places for good stimulation and are supposedly connected to each other by various nerves. Just in case you don't know where the spot is - about an inch inside the front wall of your vagina behind the pelvic bone.

Alternatively lie on your front and have him come at you from behind, which will leave you free to stimulate your clitoris with your fingers while he's going at it. Doing it 'doggy fashion' will allow you the same flexibility and he'll be able to play with your boobs at the same time, thereby not feeling quite so left out of it.

Don't just settle for him on top with you on your back with your legs apart. Experimentation is the way forward I reckon!

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A female reader, sweetheart03 United States +, writes (26 July 2008):

It could be him I don't know if he's the only guy you have been with but some men can really put it on you! If you enjoy the sex and it gets you wet and really in the mood and feels good then maybe tryin differnt ways to do it will help. Try it from the back rough and regular tell him to open ur legs and really F*** you. If that doesn't work maybe oral will. Just relax while your doing it. My friend went to the doctor they told her her G spot is deep so its far and hard to reach doing sex. Good luck

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