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male
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*oCrap14
writes: Hi,I was going around with a women in my office and she broke up.Thnigs were going very smoothly in the beginning but in no more than 1.5 months, when i was completely involved, she broke up with me for al the wrong reasons Like, not spending time with her and everything, though even she knows how passionate i was abt her.she has really made me cry a lot..and i was into pieces when we broke up, thouigh this was not my first relationship , but i had put my best effort into it as i really liked her and was thinking on lines of getting married with her.Since our breakup, we didnt talk in the begining but then realised that being in the same office we need to be wise and not show this ignorance.Now, my wedding has been fixed with another girl as my parents wanted this and i kind of like her also, but the problem is , seeing this women everyday at work, and anyways also, i am not able to get over her at all.she uses me for her work, she knows i like her and hence, she tries to be sweet soetimes and ignore the other times when she doesnt want me, because of thismy life is getting affected, i am about to get married in 2 months time, buti am not able to over come the attracton i had for this girl, coz i see her everyday..I know in all respects she is unfit for me and my family, coz all she thinks about is Beauty , makeup, looking good, GYM and being amongst good looking crowd, but still, i am thinking so much about her that my fiance and me fight often that why am i not able to give 100%.i dont say no to my Ex for the reason bec i am scared she will stop talking to me and find some other friend and wud never need me again...but other hand i also want to tech a lesson to her that she has really given me pain.she knows about my wedding thing and said me on my face, that she doesnt want to marry me but she cant see me marry someone else either.i really want to ignore her and move on, but my senses betray me and follow my heart.Please help me.
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female
reader, kdlady +, writes (20 July 2006):
This sounds like you're the guy to the other problem in here...maybe you need to read the questions in here...Is it possible you're answer from that other woman is here?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2006): What the heck are you doing even contemplating getting married to someone else when you obviously have unresolved feelings for your ex?
Not only is that very unfair on your fiancee but it is also unfair on you.
I suggest you be honest with your fiancee about this situation and ask to put the wedding on hold until you know what you want. In the mean time, find a new job, away from your ex so that you never have to see her again.
It is also pretty difficult to get over someone if you are with someone else, you ideally need time away from both women to get to a point where you actually know what you want, so that you arn't left confused as you clearly are right now.
A marriage is a lifetime commitment, so please treat it, and your fiancee, with the respect they deserve.
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