A
female
age
41-50,
*implechub75
writes:i dont know what to do, me and my ex gf we just broke-up for almost two years but why i cannt forget her, please help me what to do...shes still in my mind and all the memorise we had is always fresh... please try to help me what to do
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2007): You need counseling. You are in effect doing this to yourself (I know because I used to be like you) Are you basically just replaying memories in your head? I wish I had done such and such and then maybe...? Thinking things like 'I'll never be happy again'? If this is what is going on the first thing to know is that you are allowing these thoughts to take over your spirit [my word for it]. You have in a sense allowed these thoughts to become your idenity. The fact that you broke up and miss her is not Who you are, its merely your current life situation, if that makes sense. Basically, you have a disconnect in your thought patterns and you need to actively and consciously stop the destructive patterns. You have to reconize when you are allowing these thoughts and consciously choose another thought pattern. It takes work but eventually the new patterns will become the norm.
A
female
reader, endlesssong  +, writes (21 March 2007):
 Sorry, but I'm confused? Did you just break up? Or has it been a while? If you just broke up, its going to take time to heal. You just have to be strong and remember that it didn't work out for a reason. Remembering is fine, but don't hold onto those memories too strongly, especially right now To let go of her, you have to let yourself and tell yourself that she is no longer worth your time. If you see her in any way still, try and avoid her, at least until the hurt isn't so fresh. I wish you luck, falling out of love is very hard, but I've watched too many close friends have problems because even after a few years they still couldn't let go of their ex.
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