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I can't cope with seeing him! I'm still sick about this break up!

Tagged as: Breaking up, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (17 September 2009) 1 Answers - (Newest, 17 September 2009)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

My ex broke up with me a few months bk now over a txt and I have been trying to get over it. I refused to go back to him when he begged me to take him back. He was abusive, used to kick bins punch walls have jealous rages when i mentioned other boys i know. I know that it wasn't meant to be and I cant forgive someone that has hurt me that much. However, I have been talking to his friend.

I am moving to the same uni as him this week, its big soo thought id never see him but his friend told me he is going to be living a street away from me and that he is with someone else. I just feel sick, I can't cope with seeing him. I dont know what he will do if he sees me. He was obssessed with me and its only been a matter of weeks hes stopped emailing me.

I have to admit I am really hurt and feel worthless knowing hes just moved on with someone else when I cant do the same thing. Just feels like I am nothing and I feel such a fool for falling for him in the first place. Its been like 6months now, hes on my mind constantly, I cant look at anyone else and thinking about how he hurt me still makes me feel tearful.

What can I do just to get over it and stop feeling like this? I mean come on its been 6months, although I did see him in the end of may before i decided that i was better off without him. I just want to forget about him and move on, I dont want to feel like this anymore.

View related questions: broke up, jealous, move on

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2009):

If you could, it would be advisable to move far away from him, particularly since he is abusive. I realize though that you have probably signed a lease, etc.

He has been with the new girl minimal time. Hope he stays with her, but he is probably on the rebound after your relationship.

Consider him "armed and dangerous." If he is at a party, leave. Ask a friend to walk you home so he won't follow you. If he calls, don't talk to him. If he IMs, don't answer. It sounds like you did a good job in breaking up a relationship that presented danger. Just continue more of the same. You were a smart cookie!

If someone starts to relay any information about him, stop him or her "dead in her tracks" and tell him you don't want to know.

If he comes your way, involve the police.

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