A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have been married only two years now, known my wife for three. For the first time in the relationship I am having strong feelings and desire for another woman. The other woman is a co-worker, we are both quiet natured but talk to eachother quite abit. She tells me alot of facts about her relationship with her boyfriend good and bad, as well as other worktime conversations, she knows I'm married. I cannot get her out of my head. My wife is a good woman who has done nothing wrong I feel guilty as sin about these feelings. I'm considering giving up my marriage to pursue my co-worker whether it works out or not because my wife does not deserve this. I know Im an idiot, but I could use some advice on how to handle this.
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female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (29 November 2010):
 Well, it's time to shit or get off the pot.
Consider this, you divorce your wife for the co-worker and the co-worker doesn't really want a relationship with you. Or The two of you just don't work well together. In real life the fantasies you harbor about the co-worker may be WAY of reality.
Or.. what are you going to do 2-3 years down the line when you met another co-worker who makes you feel all special again?
I think you are not fully committed to your wife & marriage, though I will give you credit for thinking that the right thing to do is to leave your wife before jumping into a new relationship. She truly doesn't deserve any of this.
You have to be honest with your wife and then, YOU have to live with the consequences of your actions.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 November 2010): ask yourself one question: Do I love my wife?
if the answer is yes, proceed with another question: Is what I feel for my do-worker merely lust?
If your answers to these questions were both yes, then no, you shouldn't leave your wife for this.
Talk it over with your wife, and make it clear that you love her more than anything (if you do of course.)
These type of feelings are natural; men are attracted to other women.
but attraction is completely different than love.
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A
female
reader, Mjfbla +, writes (29 November 2010):
 If you are guilty as sin then you need to tell your wife your feelings. It will most likely lead to divorce, but she deserves to know, and to make that decision NOT YOU. Do you even know if this other woman has feelings for you? Tell your wife. Let her decide what to do. Maybe she feels the same for someone else to.
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