A
female
age
26-29,
*nnonymous..
writes:i dont know what to do anymore! i am soooooo extremly annoyed my mom needs to stop she finds any EXCUSE to start nagging at me i honestly cant take it anymore! i dont wanna be at home i rather just runaway! if my bf has his hand over me i dont know how to behave if i wear hand zise shorts there too short. if i dont get ready i am not girl this this and that! my room is dirty , you dont eat right EVERYTHING! i do is a problem i am everything she wants me to do she need to be quiet. also i cant do nothing litterly nothing.. help me ! i am so done with her i wanna leave i rather go to a foster home. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, SOShelp  +, writes (5 June 2012):
 CALM DOWN! You wrote this when you were p***** off I can see. First calm down.Everyone, and I mean everyone, has had annoying mothers. It is a part of life that we have to deal with. It happens when your mother realises that her 'little girl' is growing up. She still views you as a child and you feel ready to take some responsibility for your own life. What makes it worse is when you get told something you know already. Untidy room? Sounding familiar to anyone else?Just try to calm down. I KNOW it is annoying because me and my mum used to have screaming matches every night. If you hate listening to her nag do the things in the first place (I got told that so many times) then she won't nag! Voila! Give her no amo and no argument ensues.Try not to shout back at her. If you have to then concentrate on things over her shoulder so that you can't hear her (can end up in trouble) or just ask her to not shout (also can end up in trouble). Seriously though, this phase will pass. DON'T run away because, even though it doesn't seem like it at the moment, your mum does do a lot for you that you probably won't notice so cut her some slack.p.s. Tidy room makes it so much easier to find stuff! I only found that recently!
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (4 June 2012):
 Growing pains :). Don't worry, it's normal, go check and you'll see that your friends too have more or less the same problems .
Nagging mothers are annoying- but they nag because they care, and they care enough to try and teach you right. I doubt you'd find the same level of care if you run away or end up in a foster home. Do you want an example ?
Yeah, of course your mom does not like seeing your bf all over you pawing you in front of her. She cares about your modesty , and proper behaviour, and impulse control and all this boring stuff. Well, one of my best friend ended up in foster care at 13, and they did not particularly care about her modesty. They so much did not care , that she was repeatedly molested and sexually abused by different members of the family.
Why don't you take a blind leap of faith , assume that , at least at times, mother DOES know best, and she has the RIGHT to enforce rules for your own good, and don't you defuse the confrontation by- uh ! oh ! unbelievable !- actually listening to her some times ?
Why does your bf has to paw you , at least in front of your parents ', do you think that's normal ? many girls aren't even allowed to DATE at 13-15, your mom is being cool. Why do you have to wear too short shorts, do you NEED to be tacky ? Don't you know that excess is CHEAP, and that there's a way to dress for the beach and one for the streets ?...
Why does your room have to be dirty ? can't you just clean it ? ...
And so on and so forth. I don't want you to become Miss Goody - Two- Shoes. Just a bit more grown up, - keep an open mind, and see if in the advises or reproaches of your mother there may be a nugget of truth, I am sure there are things you could and SHOULD improve. Just because it's a parent who points them out to you, does not mean they are all utter crap.Same as not everything that a parent says is always Gospel's truth. But the more you mature and grow up, you should be able to see the difference, and comply with REASONABLE requests, without waging a stupid war children versus grown ups.
Very probably, if your mom sees you acting more responsible and mature, she'll become less strict , and she'll give you more freedom to do the things you want to do and she is not allowing you now. But freedom is not for children- and as long as you keep acting as a tantrumy 9 y.o. , with fantasies of " I'll just take a stick and a bundle and I'll run away somewhere ", well, no wonder she is keeping you on a short leash.
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A
female
reader, Dee2121  +, writes (4 June 2012):
 Honey i ran away when i was 13 my mom was a pain in my but everything i did it was wrong so a ran away to not here her voice anymore and have freedom. For the cause of running i made my mom's blood pressure go sky high and sent her to hospital. That Situation made me change. But honey running away does not solve anything you just make life worst for yourself and your mom. You should set down talk to your mom or write a letter to her. Cause in the end she loves you and you love her. She's just trying to protect you, that's a motherly way. But NEVER forget you only have one mother and when she's gone she's gone you cant get her back. So I hoped this helped GOOD LUCK with your mom.
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