A
female
age
30-35,
*erise
writes:I am having a dilemma right now. I have been with my boyfriend for 2 .5 years now, I love him and I believe he loves me too. We are both currently not working, and struggling financially. He is 24 years old, and I am 22.I just got offered a job out of state, and the only person we know over there is a friend of mine, we never dated but we kissed and we used to have feelings for each other 4 years ago, well my boyfriend always tells me that my friend still has some feelings for me . That normally shouldn’t be an issue, however since we don’t have enough money, I can’t rent an apartment right now. I thought about staying with my friend for a month and then move out after getting my paycheck. But I was also aware of the fact that it is not a good position to put my boyfriend into, so for the past couple of days I have been trying to get some money, so I can rent a motel for at least two weeks . But first option is my friend, and I decided to talk to my boyfriend about it, I thought for sure he was going to be against, but little did I know.I asked him what was his opinion about my accommodation, and he laughed then said “ you can stay with him, I trust you, its all right”. I was surprised, how he didn't even take time to think about it. Now I think that my boyfriend doesn’t care about me or love me enough anymore. I am just being too pensive for no reason? But this guy, used to make him jealous but he now think I can stay with him for a month? He didn't even take time to think about it. Is his reaction normal? Am I over thinking all this?Thank you
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (8 December 2012):
 He flattered you when he said that he trusted you to stay with this friend/third party.... and YOU want to look this gift horse in the mouth???????
Stop with so much unnecessary over-thinking.... and count your blessings that you are hanging with a guy who has so much trust in you.....
Good luck......
A
male
reader, Uncle PJ  +, writes (8 December 2012):
 Your boyfriend is a very caring and trusting one. Deep down he is probably hoping to god that your friend doesn't try anything with you when you go and stay with him. But because he's a friend of yours, your boyfriend didn't want to create an argument or think that there would be any problem.
He probably already thought that this may end being the case given you financial predicament, so he has time to mull it over and realise it is the best for all parties.
This isn't a sign of he doesn't care about you enough or trust you enough. This is a sign that trusts you not to do anything with your friend and believes as he is your boyfriend, you'll remain loyal because you chose him. His reaction may not be entirely normal as a more possessive and jealous boyfriend would have hated something like this, but it shows what kind of boyfriend it is.
So don't worry too much about it. If it does get a bit awkward between you and your friend then try to move out straight away. I wish you all the best with your job, I hope everything works out okay for you.
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