A
female
age
41-50,
*indalinda
writes:what should I respond when a guy I am dating said "I love you"what should I say if a guy I am dating said "I love you"? if I want to find out his "I love you" is not just for a casual relationship but for a committed (to Marriage, I mean) relationship?what is the smart way to find out?I am so dumb on relationships. Please help? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, lindalinda +, writes (17 September 2011):
lindalinda is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you everyone. People here are so nice and sincere. I got mad responses from other love forums, people there think I am insane.
A
female
reader, sammy1986  +, writes (17 September 2011):
I would take notice how he says things not by words is he very caring towards you does he asks how your day had been things like that that show you he cares are usually the way to find out if he genuinely loves you and another way is to not read to much into it as he may be totally genuine
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (17 September 2011):
 Let's start from question number two which is the most important.
Watch what he does not what he says. Talk is cheap, and, particularly in your country, " I love you "s are a dime a dozen, lots of people say these words easily and casually.
What does he do ? does he make enough time for you in his schedule ? does he introduce you to his family and friends ? does he love spending time with you also without having sex ? is he monogamous, are you definitely the only girl who he's dating ?. Does he respect your opinion also when he disagrees with it ? Is he kind and considerate ? Etc.etc.etc.
As for the first question, I'd say just be yourself , be sincere and say what you FEEL like saying. If you love him, say I love you too . ( Duh :)- I know I know ). If you are not there yet, just say Thanks . Or smile . Or kiss him without saying anything, and don't feel bad,people can't always be exactly at the same place in the same time in a relationship.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (17 September 2011):
 Here's a suggestion:
IF you love him... then you may respond by saying "I love you, too."
IF you DON'T really love him.... either because you really don't... OR because you think it is premature in whatever is going on between the two of you.... then you may respond by saying, "You know, Archie, I really like you, too... but LOVE is such an important and broad concept, I'm not sure that's the correct word to describe how I feel about you. Let's talk about love....."
Please keep this in the back of your mind:
Women offer sex in hopes that it is part of love; Men will claim that they love in the pursuit of sex.....
Good luck....
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A
female
reader, Red591 +, writes (17 September 2011):
 I love is a pretty serious thing to say but don't jump to marriage and scare him away lol. He will let you know how serious he is if he speaks in the future and if he speaks in the "we" context. If he says we should get a dog one day then this is a sentence that is a good sign he is in it for the long haul
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