A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have been in a long distance relationship for nearly a year, and it has been going massively strong. She has sent me letters telling me she cant wait to start a new life with me, im the one, we went through much to be with each other, and now theres only 1 month left until we are she suddenly decides she doesnt love me anymore. I have changed all my plans and everything for her, she wanted me too, and now within 2 weeks she has lost all feeling for me?! I dont have a clue what to think. You dont just fall out of love with someone, and if you have been you wouldnt lead them on for months with love letters and emails and phone calls? Especially long distance. Its easy to stop it, because you dont have to face them. But when she split with me, it felt like i was breaking up with her,she couldnt even give me an explanation at all. She was silent on the phone, and just kept saying my feelings have changed. Maybe im in denial but something isnt right here?The only reason I can think of is that she has met someone else? But to leave me for that long thinking we were going to be together properly and making me book flights i cant change and telling me shes crazy about me and missed the f*** out of me and cant wait to start a new life with me. Im confused.Can anyone share there views on this? I just want to know views? because my riends are baffled too. and she hasnt spoke to me since, not even to see if im okay. nothing. it isnt her shes not like this.I hope you guys can just share your views so i have some sort of comfort.Thankyou
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female
reader, love-struckxo  +, writes (29 June 2009):
 I'm sorry this has happened to you. I understand your are upset. Of course, why wouldn't you be?Long distance relationships take alot of patience and work. When your over here, and she is over there. You really have no clue what she is doing on a day to day basis, and vice versia.Maybe something has happened that you don't know about. She could of met somebody else, maybe she had a fall out with a friend or family member and she is taking it out on you.I know you probably don't want to hear this, but is it possible that she could of thought she loved you, but then realized she did not?I know it's hard, and you want an explanation. But you might not get one. Nobody truly knows why she has done this, and I don't want to put things in your mind that aren't true.The best thing is to walk away, and take this as an experience. Live and learn. It's going to be hard, it's not going to be easy. But everyday it will get easier and easier, surround yourself with people who love you, and who you love back.Try to get your mind off things, is it possible that you could go on a vacation with a couple of friends? Sometimes life sucks, but don't loose you faith. Don't beg her to come back to you. God has a plan for you, and everything will fall into place. Just wait.Take carexxxx
A
female
reader, pinktopaz  +, writes (29 June 2009):
There's always going to be a reason why someone's feelings have changed...they don't just change overnight, you're right. However, she's not giving you an explanation probably because she's afraid of hurting you even more or maybe she can't exactly pinpoint what it is. I'm sure she was aware that it was close to the time for you two to be together and didn't know what else to say but a poor answer of "my feelings have changed." Leave her alone and give her some time. She may be able to gather her thoughts and give you a better explanation if you're even willing to hear it. Maybe she was caught up in the excitement of "starting a new life" and once the day was starting to arrive, she freaked out. She may have realized that she wasn't ready for this yet or was afraid of the unknown and backed out. I'm sure she still cares about you the same way to some extent, but it isn't fair to you when you had prepared everything only to get blown off and your heart crushed.
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