A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi, i got married last year to a wonderfull men, He has a child with another women. Now we a planning to take the child to come and stay with us. Now my husband want us to go and have a meeting with the mother of his child to discuss arrangement, I dont feel comfortable and i dont want to know her or even speak to her nor be her friend. I love the child and cant wait to stay with her but i dont like the fact that now because of their child now i need to be part of this women.I need help ,i need to know how to deal with this issue Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, rcn  +, writes (26 June 2009):
 The most important part is to not seem as if your interfering with the relationship of the parents on behalf of the child. Be supportive. Let her know your interest in is the child's best interest too and that you are a good role model also.
You don't have to be friends, but being able to talk in the child's best interest with her is important. If the child gets sick, or gets hurt, you need to be on speaking terms where you feel comfortable talking to the mother.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 June 2009): suck it up!... I am a mother of a child is going to my ex's house with his wife. I want to know what type of person that is staying with and caring for my child. I am very kind and well mannered to this woman. I do not want to be her bff but, I want to meet and talk with her. If this person is not mature enough to sit and have a conversation with me about and FOR MY CHILD they she dam sure is not going to watch her or be involved with her. So for the love of your husband and the child --- grow up.It not about how you feel... it is about the child!BTW that's exactly what I told my ex and his wife... and guess what?? Now she has no issues and realizes how immature and unacceptable her behavior was. We get along fine for the sake of my children.
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