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How do you ask a guy where your relationship stands?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (29 April 2009) 4 Answers - (Newest, 29 April 2009)
A female United States age 41-50, *rinPatterson writes:

How do you ask a guy where your relationship stands after 2 years?

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A female reader, Emilysanswers United Kingdom +, writes (29 April 2009):

"So where do we stand? It's been 2 years and I still have no idea if this is going anywhere.

I'm 30-35 now and I've realised I can't mess about any more as I want marriage / kids / career / house / llamma farm / insert dream here ... someday... and well if you don't see yourself with me long term then I need to know."

Ask him after sex.

Good Luck!! xx

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A male reader, chris0803 United States +, writes (29 April 2009):

I would kinda casually ask him where he sees himself in 5 years...And he'll prolly name a job or something or a new position at his job...Then ask him if he still sees himself with you...And if he really does care for you then he will tell you yes of course but if he says no or idk then I would say that he may not be the one...

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A female reader, Sweet-thing United Kingdom +, writes (29 April 2009):

Sweet-thing agony auntI think the best approach is to just bring it up, but timing is essential. Don't ask the big relationship question when he's stressed out about other things, or just coming home after a long day. With my b/f the best time to talk to him about anything is in the mornings when we first wake up. He likes to lay in bed and snuggy with me and we talk about things in a soft, quiet, non-threatening way. He tends to listen and be more responsive to me if I wait until then to talk to him about my feelings on any number of things. But your ideal time may be different. Just remember most guys hate the relationship discussion, so disguise it if you can. Don't tell him ahead of time, "Tonight when we get home, we need to talk about our relationship." Yuk! A sure to make him run to the bar with his buddies after work just to avoid you. So a surprise attack is better and make it fairly casual if you can. Read his body language sometime it speaks more than his words. Good luck.

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A female reader, niki20 United States +, writes (29 April 2009):

niki20 agony auntjust be like, hey i saw 'nancy' (pick one of your friends) at the store and she asked if we were serious and it got me thinking about were our relationship stands. i told her _ b/c i wasnt sure. approach him calmly and if he doesnt say we are serious (if thats what you want to be.) then ask him you can be.

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