A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Me and my Gf of 2 and a half years have just started having sex, we are both 16. And we decied that after 2 years we were ready.But after having sex a hand full of times (safely of course) including alot of foreplay, she doesnt feel anything during inter course or feels a little at the begining and ocasionally i still hurt her.Also she insists she doesnt like clitoral stimulation even though she gets very wet.[Moderator note: This was from the same poster, submitted in a different question][Added by moderator:] My girlfriend and i are having sex more often now.But she claims she doesn't like me "playing" with her clitoris, even though she gets really, really wet and her clitoris gets erected.Is she just not use to the feeling and will she get used to it or should i just stop?What should i do?Thanks.
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clitoris, foreplay, really wet Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2009): A few things may help here - There's two major spots for orgasm in the female, first the clit. The previous answer is completely true in my experience. A little there is great, but too much can hurt. Break it up, leave it a while before trying again. At the end of the day she knows her body and will tell you how she feels.
Sex can really hurt the first few times, and takes a while to get into. Biology first, the G spot is a rough group of cells you can feel with your finger about an inch up the vagina on the inner wall. Initially it is a small cluster, but the more it is stimluated, the more responsive it becomes and grows. This is why few women orgasm there at first - it has to be developed. So don't be too hard on yourself.
Finally, i promise. For women the biggest sex organ is not down there - it's her brain. We respond to emotional stimuli and sounds. Tell her she's beautiful, caress her during intercourse, Or if she prefers it more boystrous get cheeky. Finding out what gets her going mentally is far more important - get that right and the rest will be so much easier.
A
female
reader, yggdrasill  +, writes (18 August 2009):
 I'm only answering on the second half of your question, and I'm answering from my own experience. That's a VERY sensitive area for me. It only takes about two or three seconds for me to reach orgasm that way. However, if it continues after that I get a huge range of feelings. Starting with something that I can only compare to really having to pee, discomfort, annoyance, pain, and all sorts of others all flying at me at once. Basically, it's overwhelming and the pleasure sensation takes a backseat. This may be her issue as well.
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A
female
reader, hijacked_dignity +, writes (18 August 2009):
 When I first started having sex, I couldn't even tell the difference when my boyfriend wore a condom or not. That's how 'numb' I was to sex down there. Now that we have had sex for almost a year, I can definitely tell the difference between him putting on the rubber or not. What she is going through is completely normal, and I think most girls go through it. Sex for a girl is something that definitely takes getting used to, after all it consists of someone repeatedly shoving something inside you over and over again (to put things in a rather blunt perspective). As for clit stimulation, does she masturbate? Maybe she isn't used to the sensation. Also, if she is really turned on during foreplay and you are touching her there, the clit becomes ultra sensitive, so maybe you are trying a little too hard? Either way, everything will take time and you two will become better at knowing what turns the other on more. Just keep her feelings in mind and take it slow for a little while.
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