A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Welll i'am a guy and i jsut want to ask how do some guys when dating a girl they like remain sane. By that i mean how do i stop myself from thinking she will be meeting someone either at work or school. How do i know she will not meet someone online or how do i know that her friends that are guys will not try to hit on her. Or maybe she is planning a trip with her friends in the summer and you are worried that she will meet someone in the summer and leave you for the other guy. The one that scares me the most is that she will find another man and move on without she telling you about it, so you never get the chance to forget and move on. How do most guy's do this, i think i'am just insecure, but i see alot of these things happening all the time?
View related questions:
at work, insecure, move on Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Little_Owl  +, writes (5 August 2012):
 You can't know. There is a reason why most relationships never work out. A partner who is the right match for you, and who you can be serious about and trust, requires being selective about a lot of things. She will not be easy to find, I can tell you that. Generally, it's best to enjoy the relationship while it lasts, instead of wasting that time worrying. Because in the most likely scenario, it won't.
All you can do is work on the relationship constantly. Give her reasons to love you more than others. Allowing her freedom and trusting her would be two reasons to start off with. If despite of that she still runs off with another guy, then she doesn't want what you want, and is definitely not suitable for you.
Also - has this girl given you any reason to be so insecure? If she did, then you might want to leave her. Once trust is broken, it's hard to fix.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2012): It really all comes down to how the girl makes you feel. The girl should make sure you feel secure about the relationship by the way she treats you. You might tend to be a little insecure on your own, but your girl should also make you FEEL secure.
If you wonder, and just feel that a girl is not exactly all that loyal, it will make you go insane with insecurities. You should both be securely attached. If you're not, you will always wonder if some other dude is going to come into the picture and sweep her away.
The security relies solely on how you both bond, and it might take time for it to happen.
*And a very important thing:
Oh, and by the way, I am telling you this as a GIRL. So I know how we can be about this issue:
It is NOT okay for a girl with a boyfriend to go hang around other guys by herself. No matter how "good of a guy friend" he is. If she respects you, and seriously wants to be friends with that guy she will bring you along without a problem. Girls try to play the friend card way too much...but you should do the same with your friends that are girls. It's all about respect, and giving each other the spot in your lives that you deserve.
...............................
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (4 August 2012):
 You can never no these things for sure, but this is where trust plays its part. So really all you can do is to take your time and get to know the girl. Take things slow and see how things go, once you get by the dating part and get in to a serious relationship you should be able to trust your partner or else it will never work. Yes you can have these doubts in your mind but at the end of the day it could ruin a perfectly good relationship. You need to be able to trust a girl in order for things to work and vice versa.
...............................
|
