A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have been with my boyfriend for six months. I have dated seriously before, but he has never dated at all. I love him, but lately that love has been disipating. I am a very independent and ambitious person, and he is stifling me. I know he really loves me, and I think he's afraid of losing me, but if this doesn't change he will lose me. I feel bad because I know he means well, but I cannot keep doing this. We are both full-time college students, but he is a music major taking 12 hours, and I am a psychology major taking 18 hours. I don't have too much free time, but when I do have free time, I'd like to spend some of it alone. Another problem we have is that he picks on me all the time. A little bit of teasing is fine...that's flirting and nothing else, but the extent that he teases me is not necessary. It makes me feel bad about myself and get angry.How do I get him to be nice and not quite so clingy?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 April 2009): have you mentioned to him that it upsets you?
i had the same problem just be honest with him.
sit him down don't be mean but calmfully explain that you do love him and don't want anyone else but he needs to take a step back and relax otherwise he will lose you.
it's hard but needs to be done. with boys sometimes you just have to he blunt and honest otherwise they don't get it. he needs to understand that in a relationship there are two people. to be a succesful couple you have to consider your partners feelings too.
if he can't do that then maybe he is not the 'one' for you.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 April 2009): you have to talk to him... any one you are with should understand that you can be with someone and still be able to be your self. That means having time to your self. Loving you first and then us. other wise it does not work. Also sometimes when people tease its their way of communicating. mean = im upset about something. The key is communication, you have to ask or tell him when you say that I hear-----. I don't like how it makes me feel. Its also normal for him to be jealous of your time and feel left out... so I think with you sitting down and talking to him (little digs left out) things will be ok.good luck
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