A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My bf did something about a week ago that made me very, very, very suspicious. Since then, however, I've used my own techniques to keep a very watchful eye on whether or not my suspicions were right, and at least so far, they aren't, so I'm ready and willing to back off a bit. As far as my guy knows, though, I'm still insanely hurt by what happened and am not over it. I've been very distant from him the last few days as I seriously considered breaking up with the guy because I was telling myself "you know what, you apparently can't trust him, so forget it. Maybe you just need to get over your insecurities before you enter another relationship, or maybe he really is doing wrong like you think; either way, forget about the guy and move on."I haven't touched him or talked to him except when absolutely necessary since, again, I assumed I just needed to get over him (and was actually doing this quite well).Since he did several things (without me knowing, so he thought) that greatly increased my confidence in him, I feel like I'm ready to forgive. Now the question is, how do I let him know without him thinking he can get away with it again or whatever?He'll be back from soccer practice in 30 minutes...
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionCeliaaletta: Yes, you are. I already caught him doing one thing wrong and was suspicious that it would lead to another, so to speak. But as far as I knew, it never lead to another, so I was willing to let it go.
Too bad just as he walked in the door I was talking to the girl and she proved to me that he did exactly what I was worried about.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (2 April 2010):
Sit down with him, and just tell him that you're ready to forgive, but that you won't ever stand for it again. That way, he knows you're forgiving, but also knows that if it happens again, you'll walk. And mean it.
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