A
female
age
41-50,
*eelieboots
writes:How do I convince him hes making a mistake?My boyfriend is broke. He lost his job last year and even though he is working again, he has such a backlog of debt that he struggles. I try to help him in every way - buying food, helping with the bills but now he feels that he has to rely on me to live. He still owns a house with his ex that they want to sell but it has serious negative equity and he is stuck paying half the mortgage. He is depressed and tells me that he doesnt love me or wants to break it off but from his actions and behaviour and also what he says I know its the depression talking and he wants to push me away to make things easier. He has recently said that he may move out bak to the house that he owns with his ex to save £300 rent we pay monthly. He told me he wants to stay but cannot afford it or depend on me to pay the rent - which I have offered and seems to think that we will work when he is living there. He is thinking about what to do as he also has a daughter and needs to consider the affect of moving back in with her and leaving again and the fact that him and his ex dont get on. She uses him and plays mind games with him and it will do his depression no good if he goes up there. He also leaves me in a rotten situation - alone in this house, no furniture and miserable without him. I need help convincing him not to go to her and that money will work out but dunno where to start.
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debt, depressed, his ex, lost his job, money Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2010): Girl, let him go. The drama alone is crazy. If he was my boyfriend and moved back in with his ex, he would be taking me too. Depression is a condition that can be very dangerous to the person depressed as well as the people they interact with. I would think seriously about his motives and ask myself if he really may want to reconcile with his ex.
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