A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am very close to a colleague; we have a similar sense of humour, and make each other laugh all the time, we've kissed twice - very passionate, very intense, but gone no further. Since then, he's not mentioned it, or acted in any way like he's interested in me. However, he has texted me that he'd like to well... y'know... and I know he was sober at the time before you say anything.I really like him, although he is 4 years younger than I am, and has a different lifestyle to mine. His team-mates have all indicated that he thinks very favourably of me, and we get on like a house on fire both inside and outside work!We're mates and the attraction is clearly there. I just don't know how to approach things without making it awkward between us - or coming out of it like the office bike!! Argh! Help!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2008): Little update:
We had a chat and he told me how much he liked me and valued me, and didn't want to take advantage of me when we were out drinking.
I ended up that night in his bed.
Now he's breaking dates, chatting up co-workers, and generally being a tool.
I've made it clear that I'm not "hurt", and it's all very civil. However, I'm completely ashamed of myself for doing something I never thought I'd do and I AM hurt. I believed him when he said the sweet things he said that night.
I would always advise anyone in the future to find someone outside of work to take your colleague based fantasies out on!!!
Sigh.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2008): It depends what you are looking for at the moment. I think that if he really wanted to go out with you he would ask you out and start making an effort. He knows you like him already. He also knows you well - he's with you everyday for 8 hours!! It would seem to me that he just wants to sleep with you but whether he wants to see you after that, hard to know. But if you are just curious anyway to see what it would be like with him and aren't looking for anything serious, go for it. It might be awkward in work afterwards though and the team-mates will probably know too. Good luck with whatever you decide!!
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